This Guy Made A ‘Dating Resume’ Explaining Why You Should Date Him And It’s Hilariously Brilliant

Instagram / @notjoeyadams

What the hell is up with dating these days? Back in the day, my parents met the oldfashioned way — in a bar, completely hammered. Now it’s all about Tinder Powerpoint presentations and dating resumes, apparently.

At least, that’s how Joey Adams approached getting the girl. When he saw an “an outrageous babe, a straight 10/10” outside the cafeteria at MSU, he approached her and asked her out.

But the “absolutely gorgeous girl” wasn’t having it; she laughed (ouch, sorry buddy) and asked for a dating resume, which, for some odd reason, he didn’t have on his person. At least, he didn’t then. But Joey has learned.

Instagram / @notjoeyadams

After being turned down by the girl, Joey put together this impressive CV that advertised him as a “lover of breakfast foods & puppies” who “has never lost a Snapchat streak.” He also claims to have no Tinder record because he doesn’t “objectify women for the sake of ‘getting ass.'”

The resume breaks down how he spends his time (including running his dog’s Instagram and Facebook) and includes a list of his favorite things.

OK, so it’s a little extra, but is it wrong to say I’m impressed? You get that girl, Joey. Thought Catalog Logo Mark

About the author

Callie Byrnes

Callie is a writer, editor, and publisher at Thought Catalog. Her debut book, ‘The Words We Left Behind,’ was released in January 2024.

More From Thought Catalog