Oh, the Outgoing Introvert. Such a challenging persona to figure out, and yet, even more perplexing persona to be. If you are an Outgoing Introvert, you can be extremely shy and simultaneously be the most personable person in the entire world; it all depends on who you are with, and your surroundings.
Outgoing Introverts can come across extremely insecure, and that is because they feel unstable when they are constantly surrounded by people. It isn’t always that they are uncomfortable in their own skin; introverts feel overwhelmed and start to shut down when their need to be alone is not met.
Outgoing Introverts can be the most open and fun people to be around, but they need certain things to help them thrive and recharge their batteries. Here is a list of things they require (besides, perhaps, a glass of wine, or a cocktail).
1. Physical Space and Time to Open Up
You might notice a decent amount of physical tension when talking to an Outgoing Introvert. That is because they need a certain level of comfortability to be all warm and fuzzy towards you. Except for them, comfortability starts on the inside and works its way outward in a slow and selective process.
Outgoing Introverts don’t like to be touched by people they barely know. They like to build up a rapport with someone before they begin to break down the barrier that they constantly put up. Don’t just expect an Outgoing Introvert to be all over you. They are carefully evaluating you in their minds to make sure they can let their body loose around you, which could mean simply letting loose in their own space, let alone entering someone else’s space.
If you give an Outgoing Introvert some physical space and time to open up towards you, they will be all about intimacy, and continue to thrive each day by getting even closer to you, both physical and mentally.
Solitude is very important to anybody, but to an Outgoing Introvert, it is the most important thing they need to thrive. It doesn’t matter where an Outgoing Introvert goes to achieve solitude, as long as they don’t have to speak to anyone for a sufficient amount of time. It could be on a crowded beach enjoying the beautiful scenery, or completely alone in their room. Just give them a good book or some headphones, and make sure they have zero human interaction for as long as they need.
Solitude can look a lot like loneliness to some people, but to introverts it is nothing but pure happiness and peace of mind. Once they achieved this mindful state, they bounce back happier and more social than ever.
3. Clear Communication from Loved Ones
Outgoing Introverts don’t care if you don’t want talk to them. In fact, they can go very long periods of time without talking to people who are close to them. They prefer to skip the small talk, but what they can’t get passed is when friends and loved ones are not up front with them.
The only thing worse than small talk to an Outgoing Introvert, is someone that isn’t being completely open and honest. Don’t lie to them, and don’t beat around the bush with them, because they will shut down or distance themselves from you. They need clear, concise communication, even if they are receiving criticism. Talking things through is their favorite way to enhance growth and thrive, so keep that in mind before getting close to the Outgoing Introvert.
Along with clear, concise communication, there comes a certain level of depth when dealing with the Outgoing Introvert. The opposite of small talk is a deep, meaningful conversation, and this is truly where the Outgoing Introverts thrive.
Deep to their core, they need alone time to regain strength, but they also thoroughly enjoy having conversations with people, as long as the topic is something they can expand on for hours on end. They are usually very knowledgeable about an array of things, so this gives them the appearance of being very outgoing. However, they are just thriving in certain conversations because they are extremely passionate about the topic at hand. Simply contributing to a deep conversation is giving the Outgoing Introvert a stimulating feeling that they don’t get from talking to just anybody, so give them liberty, and give them depth!
5. A Genuine Friend Circle
Outgoing Introverts don’t like being a part of a big circle. They often feel overwhelmed when their attention is divided among even more than one person at a time. However, they truly thrive when they are around the people who know and understand them the most, and their circle usually consists of the most genuine people you will ever meet.
Since Outgoing Introverts are often misunderstood, their requirements for friendship include people who are open-minded and patient. They like people who will listen to them, empathize with them, and take their emotions into account because sometimes they want to be left alone, and their true friends will have to understand that. Many times the Outgoing Introvert will feel bad about having to turn their friends away, but this is just something they need to do. They will be happy and thrive when the people close to them don’t make them feel guilty, but instead, leave them be until they meet again and act as if nothing has changed.
6. One-on-One Time
Whether you’re a friend, lover, or family member of the Outgoing Introvert, the time you will notice them flourish the most is during a one-on-one conversation. Once you are selected to be inside their circle, they will want to know absolutely everything about you. The time you will spend with them won’t be about partying, or going out to meet new people, but it will be all about the two of you.
Because the Outgoing Introvert is a naturally selective person, they want to feel a genuine, deep connection with the people they spend time with. Since they also need their alone time, it means a lot to them when they set aside time to be with their loved ones. During this time, they will spend hours completely focused on one person and that person will feel like the most appreciated individual just by being in their presence. That is because it is completely natural for them to thrive in situations where their attention is undivided.
Outgoing Introverts love to be in love. They thrive when they get to give their heart away to someone, because it is not something they do very often. Although it takes them a while to open up, when they finally do, they do so whole-heartedly and with zero doubt in their minds. They will be the most intense lover you have ever known, because to them, it’s not about quantity, but rather the quality of that love.
The Outgoing Introvert needs love in order to thrive. They don’t do well in casual, short-term relationships and they certainly don’t seek them. Deep down, all Outgoing Introverts want is that one individual that they can give their love to, because trust me, they have so much love inside them waiting to be shared with the right person. Just be patient with an Outgoing Introvert and let them love you in their own time, because once they do, you will be the only person in their eyes.
Because of the Outgoing Introvert’s quiet and reserved ways, they can often come across bitchy or stand offish. They absolutely HATE being called out for being quiet, so instead, respect that they are different from you, and let them come out of their shell naturally.
When you respect the Outgoing Introvert and allow them to feel comfortable just being themselves, they truly thrive. In time, you will understand that they aren’t malicious in any way, they just want to feel valued and respected, and afterwards they will reciprocate tenfold.