30 Questions That Will Tell You Whether Or Not They’re Worth Pursuing
Do you want to be better for them, or do you feel "off the hook" now that you have someone who loves and accepts you as you are?
1. Why, exactly, do you like this person?
2. Aside from those reasons, do you feel a love for them inexplicably? Do your feelings for them begin in your mind or in your heart? Do they defy logic?
3. Does your love for this person change what you thought you wanted out of life right now?
4. What you thought love would be like?
5. What you thought your type was?
6. What you thought were your deal-breakers?
7. If you could retrace your dating history, and remove every word you have ever said to one another, what could you infer about them simply from their actions?
8. What could you infer about your relationship simply from their actions?
9. What could you infer about *your* feelings simply from your actions?
10. Did you become monogamous because they didn’t want you to have multiple partners, or because you stopped wanting to see other people when they came into your life?
11. Do you spend more time trying to impress them or connect with them?
12. When you consider the prospect of not having them in your life anymore, is your primary reaction panic or sadness? (Panic = you love the idea of them; sadness = you love them.)
13. What would you wish you had done in 5 years from now?
14. 10 years?
15. If the basis of your physical relationship could only be kissing for the next month, would you want to spend the same amount of time with them, and just do that?
16. Have you thought about a long-term future with them?
17. If so, what excites you more: the prospect of a big party and a ring and a house, or the fact that you will get to live with them every day, and do everything together?
18. Do you like this person as much as you love them?
19. Do you want to be better for them, or do you feel “off the hook” now that you have someone who loves and accepts you as you are?
20. Are you compatible because you complement, accept, respect and admire one another, or because you are fundamentally “alike?”
21. Do you enjoy one another’s company because your tastes align, or because your values do?
22. Do you know that they love you because they tell you or because they make you feel it?
23. Could you live without them?
24. Would you want to?
25. What do you feel in your body when you look in their eyes?
26. Is there a natural comfort with them?
27. Can you sit in silence together?
28. If you could no longer see this person anymore, what would hurt more: that you’d have to figure out what to do with your life, or that you wouldn’t be able to spend time with them?
29. If you knew that the only thing that really mattered in terms of a relationship in which you will thrive is if you have that unexplainable, otherworldly connection, would it make you feel scared that you perhaps do not have it with this person or scared because you absolutely *do* and this really could be *it?*
30. Did these questions make you feel more sure, or more confused? (Both mean you already have the answer you’re looking for.) 