He was as equally incredible as he was terrible. When I was in his presence, I felt excitement. I felt joy. But if I’m being honest, it was always up and down. At times, it felt too good to be true, and moments later I realized that it was. But I kept holding on, because I cared. I cared about him a whole lot, perhaps too much. I cared about his happiness, more than my own. I wanted to protect him, more than I protected myself.
Inevitably he hurt me. I stuck around, my attachment grew, and I was left heartbroken. I don’t blame him; our timing was off from the start. He had his shit and I had mine too. He apologized. Maybe he was truly sorry, but what really mattered from this point on was how I handled things going forward.
Guys will always come back, even if it isn’t serious. They all come back. They all reach out again. But that doesn’t mean you should be so quick to let them back in.
Sure, initially you’ll get excited. Maybe you’ll start thinking about how much you really miss this person. Reminiscing on memories can take all your energy, leaving you now longing for attention from this person. Before you know it, you forget how they treated you prior. The pain, the disappointment.
You’re in control with what you choose to do next. You don’t have to let them hurt you again. You don’t need to be argumentative. Some people are meant to enter and exit our lives. There is a lesson in each experience. In each experience there are moments, that shape us into who are as people.
We hurt people, we all hurt people. This isn’t about blaming anyone, it is inevitable that we will disappoint others, whether it be intentional or not.
So, let your past remain your past, and look forward:
1. Travel outside of the country.
2. Live in a new city.
3. Make out with a stranger.
4. Write stuff down.
6. Smile at people.
7. Take a painting class.
8. Dance like a maniac in front of the mirror.
9. Run outside.
10. Walk around a museum.
12. Draw something.
13. Create an original recipe.
14. Take risks.
15. Follow yourself.
He broke your heart. Your disappointment took your breath away. You felt hopeless and alone. You blamed yourself and wondered if there was anything you couldn’t have done differently. Forgive him and move on. But don’t let him hurt you again.