Love Me Loudly

Do not send mixed signals. Do not make me play mind reader. Do not expect me to guess how you feel about me. Tell me yourself. Speak your mind. Use your words. Raise your voice. Stop holding back your emotions and let them pour from you. I want to know what you think about when your eyes meet mine. I want to hear what your heartbeat is screaming.

Fuck your friends who tease you about being whipped by your girlfriend. Fuck passersby who are offended by a little bit of PDA. Fuck society for making you feel like you have to hold back your emotions, like acting heartless will protect you, like you are cooler when you do not care.

I want to see your vulnerable side. I want you to see you raw. I want to see you without a clamp around your heart.

I’m not going to chase after someone who seems semi-interested. I’m not going to waste my time with someone who only gives me a little attention, a little respect, a little breadcrumb trail that is meant to satisfy me. I want an all-inclusive love. An unmistakeable love.

You don’t have to hold yourself back around me. I’m not going to call you clingy. I’m not going to make you feel stupid about your innermost feelings. I am going to be impressed by your honesty because most people are afraid to embrace their truth. They play pretend in place of acting authentic. They distance themselves when they should be closing the gap.

I don’t want you to play it cool. I want you to love me loudly.

Hug me from behind. Pull me onto your lap. Cuddle me. Play footsie with me beneath the dinner table. Call me beautiful. Call me baby. Kiss my forehead, my cheeks, my stomach.

Snap candid pictures of me. Post anniversary statuses. Litter your texts with hearts. Change me to the background of your phone. Rest your hand on my thigh as you drive. Text me three times in a row. Call me to hear my voice.

Surprise me with flowers on the front stoop. Kiss me on the neck. Hold my waist as we walk. Interlock our fingers from across the table. Press me against the wall for a kiss. Press me against the kitchen counters for another.

Introduce me as your girlfriend, your forever, your one and only. Take me out with your friends. Invite me for dinner with your parents. Friend request my cousins. Spend the holidays with me. Count down the days until my birthday.

I want you to be proud to call me your girlfriend. I don’t want you to hide me away in your apartment. I don’t want to date you undercover. I want the world to know about us. I want to share our story with the universe because we are too excited to keep it to ourselves.

I want you to love me loudly. I want you to love me with everything you’ve got.