You Don’t Get To Pick And Choose When You Want Her In Your Life
She used to think that’s what would make you walk away. But now she’s the one leaving.
One day she won’t be a choice you get to make. Because when all she has done is choose you and you haven’t been able to do the same, she’ll get tired of trying for your time and attention.
One day she just won’t have it in her to keep trying to prove she deserves a place in your life when you’ve always had a place in her heart.
Because while you were picking and choosing if you wanted her in your life she never had to wonder or think twice about what she thinks and feels.
One day she’ll stop worrying so much about every little thing she said and every move she made. She used to think that’s what would make you walk away. But now she’s the one leaving.
She knows now it’s more of a loss to you than it will ever be her if you don’t value her the same.
One day she’ll get tired of wearing her heart on her sleeve and loving you the same in the way she wished you loved her even half as much and it will be then she learns to love herself with that same magnitude.
One day she’ll stop missing you when you’re standing right there because you aren’t being what she needs in a person. Sometimes you are, then other times you completely shift. And she’s left completely perplexed about it.
In her mind, she wonders how can you be so sure of someone who doubts you or doubts how they feel about you?
And when she finally does walk away she’ll miss you. She’ll want to reach out to you. She’ll want to know how you’re doing. But at the same time, she won’t. Because everything about you hurts her. Everything about you reminds her of how you never chose her entirely. Everything about you reminds her of the person she never stopped trying for but couldn’t convince to feel the same no matter what she said or did.
The truth is she finally stopped choosing you in hopes that maybe you’d prove you’d choose her after all this time.
Because that’s all she’s ever wanted. 
