1. She needs you to put in effort.

She needs you to remind her that you care, because if one day you seem a little distant, she’s going to assume that you’ve lost feelings for her. She needs reassurance that you still want her, that you still love her. Otherwise she’ll think she’s losing you.

2. She isn’t going to accept your compliments.

When you tell her she looks beautiful, she’s going to shake her head. Don’t take it personally. It’s not that she thinks you’re a liar. She just doesn’t believe that she’s pretty. It’s going to take her a while to get used to your compliments.

3. She’s going to pretend she’s fine when she isn’t at all.

She won’t want to bother you with her problems, because she doesn’t want to feel like a burden. So she’ll hide her feelings inside. She’ll fake smiles. She’ll play the part of the girl she thinks you want her to be.

4. But there will also be days when she complains nonstop.

She needs someone that she can vent to about traffic, her boss, her grades, the rain — everything. And she won’t want you to tell her that she shouldn’t worry about those things, that she should calm down. She probably doesn’t even want you to try to solve her problems. She just wants you to listen. To be there.

5. She’s going to expect the worst.

If she accuses you of cheating or of not loving her, it’s probably not because you did something wrong. It’s because she can’t understand how a person like you would stay with a person like her. It’s because she can’t wrap her mind around the fact that she’s found someone who wants her.

6. She needs some space.

She’s secretly worried you’ll leave her, which is why she doesn’t want to get overly attached to you. She doesn’t want to spend every hour of the week with you, because if you broke up, she wouldn’t know what to do with herself.

7. She’s going to keep her guard up.

She won’t want to rush into a relationship. It’s going to take her a while to fully let you into her heart, because boys have been mean to her in the past. That’s why she is going to wait to date you until she knows she can trust you, until she knows you’re for real.

8. You’re not magically going to make her life complete.

Don’t try to save her. Even if you do everything right, you can’t expect her to suddenly be happy with her life. There’s more to her world than you. Even if things are going well in your relationship, she might still be having issues with her parents, her job, or her finances. You can’t fix everything.

9. She’s going to feel like she doesn’t deserve you.

There might be days when she thinks about dumping you — not because she doesn’t like you, but because she likes you too much. She thinks you’re better off without her. That you deserve better than someone like her. She just wants you to be happy and she doesn’t want to hold you back from that.

10. She’s pretty amazing.

She may hate herself — but she doesn’t have any real reason to. She’s a beautiful, talented, intelligent girl who has a bright future in front of her. She’s the whole package. A huge catch. Anyone would be lucky to have her.