This Is Why You Will Never Be Able To Change Him

Twenty20 / @valentinadoria

You will never change who he is deep inside of his core. No matter how much you want to. No matter how much he tries to pretend you can. And no matter how much you love him. He’s not ever going to change.

It’s not that he doesn’t want to change or that he doesn’t think he can be a better person, it’s just that who he is, is not enough for you. Who he is, is frankly not what you deserve or need.

You deserve better and you need better and you should want better.

And I don’t mean ‘better’ in looks or in his smile or charm. You don’t need someone who can play pretend. You don’t need someone who can fool you. Fool you into thinking he’s different. Someone who can fool you into thinking he’s the one.

Truthfully, to hell with all those games. To hell with his cold hearted glances. To hell with his beautiful smile. To hell with his sly smiles.

You need earnest love. Honest love. Compassionate love. You need big love that you will never, ever have with him.

And I know you think you can change him. You think you can steer him right back on the course. You think you can walk him into the right direction. But he needs to do by himself. You can’t help him, or change his sinister ways.

You don’t need someone in your life that is constantly going to bring you down. That’s not love. Because love isn’t trying to change someone or trying to make someone grow at the same pace as you. Love isn’t trying to make someone be different than who they are. Love isn’t pleading for them to change their values or their wants. Love isn’t trying to turn a player into a love.

Love isn’t trying to transform someone when they don’t want to be transformed.

You won’t change him. You won’t change his heart or his soul. You won’t change the way he thinks about other girls. You won’t change the way he wants to be with other people or get wild on a Thursday night at 2 am. You won’t ever be able to turn him into the man you want him to be.

So move on. Let go.

You’re wasting your time trying to change a tin man. You’re wasting on your heart on him. You’re wasting away and your getting so tired. So stop. Stop hoping that it will work out. Stop praying that he will be different tomorrow or the next day, or the next day. 

He’s not going to change.

So leave him be. Let him go. Let him run and let him never come back. And maybe once you let him go, you’ll start to change yourself for the better. And maybe, just maybe, you’ll realize that he isn’t what you want after all.  Thought Catalog Logo Mark

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