What To Do When You Realize They Do Not Love You Back

Matthew Weiber
Matthew Weiber

You said you did. I remember you did as you held me in your arms on a sunny Monday afternoon, you kissed me on the forehead and you said “I love you”, I remember I thought the sun was shining for me that day, heck, maybe the sunshine was just me radiating.

Now I know you didn’t.

I know you didn’t love me because when you couldn’t understand me, instead of trying, you only got angry. And angrier when I tried to help and it didn’t help.

I know you didn’t love me because I have social anxiety and when it acted up and I chose to keep to myself in a big group of people, you took it personally and it ended up with me on the hotel floor, in a puddle of my own tears.

I know you didn’t love me because you never actually understood, you only agreed to get the tears to stop. And it happened again and again and I thought it was because you just needed time to understand.

I know you didn’t love me because you only ever wanted to “hang out “, and that usually meant you would come over when you had free time, and fall asleep on my bed while I sat at my desk, and watched.

I know you didn’t love me because you said you missed me and when you came back, the first person you wanted to spend time with was your avatar on your computer game.

I know you didn’t love me because I told you family was important to me and all you did was encourage me to ditch family gatherings, and talk down my parents.

I know you didn’t love me because I told you all this and you said you’d try.

And when I finally had the courage to let you go, you said you never actually tried.

So I said goodbye. Thought Catalog Logo Mark

Fluent in spiel.

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