20 Things I Learned The Year I Turned 18

1. Take ‘love’ out of your daily vocabulary. You do not ‘love’ a television show; you really like it and you think it’s great.

2. Smile and laugh only if necessary. They can’t break you if they think you’re already broken.

3. Talk less and observe more.

4. Spend less time with people and enjoy your own company. Sometimes they only hang with you because they want to be nice.

5. Don’t act surprised or mad when someone disappoints you. They don’t owe it to you to live up to your expectations.

6. Don’t speak if you’re only going to say something negative. Be mysterious but not pessimistic.

7. Donate things. Donate half of your bookshelf and drawers. You won’t only be helping others, but you’ll be making room for new and better things. Donate half of your closet, especially the ones he touched because you don’t need his memory anymore.

8. Take pride in what you look like. It’s not everything, but it helps. Invest in red lipstick. When you look good, you feel good.

9. Spoil yourself every now and again if you can. Don’t forget to treat yourself to the things you want if you can afford them.

10. Read books, watch a lot of new TV shows, and go to the movies often, even if you have to go alone. Learn from the losses of the characters and the rawness of their pain.

11. Indulge in new music. Download songs by artists you never thought you would enjoy. Pay attention to the soundtrack of the movies and TV shows you see. New music is good because old music reminds you of old heartbreaks.

12. Try new things. Give sushi and spaghetti a chance. Try different flavors of tea and add cream or sugar just to experiment.

13. Drink more alcohol because you’re happy. Drink more water because you love yourself enough to stay healthy. Drink less pop because it’s unhealthy.

14. Sleep more. Sleep in the afternoon if you want, or in between classes, or on the bus. Sleeps as much as you can, the completely sleepless nights are on their way.

15. Filter your list of friends. Find out who doesn’t look for you when you’re not there and start calling them acquaintances. Find out who freaks out when you deactivate your Facebook and would go out of their way to make sure you’re okay, and keep them.

16. Forgive those who left you and those who let you leave.

17. Travel. For the love of God, please, please, please, travel.

18. Finally learn how to ice skate. Damn it.

19. Choose kindness over being right.

20. Above all else, forgive yourself for all the mistakes you made last year. It’s over now. Let it go. Lose sleep over better things and bleed for better reasons.