“I will not be another flower, picked for my beauty and left to die. I will be wild, difficult to find, and impossible to forget.”
-Erin Van Vuren
Trust me, I don’t understand it either.
You wake up to that “Good morning, beautiful” text and each night you close those innocent eyes thinking maybe just maybe this is it. This one is different.
As quick as the words fell from their lips, they are gone.
It’s as though you’ve begun to anticipate the hollow hopes. It’s like you know when the feeling hits that it’s not going to end in your favor. It ends with no apology, no notice, no emotion, nothing. It’s a vicious cycle.
But you do it over and over again.
You keep downloading those dating apps thinking it will be a different outcome when deep down you know the brutal truth. The brutal truth being that as much as you don’t want to believe it, it’s just not your time.
You now have to tell your best friend and parents that once again “It just didn’t work out.” Like a broken record they reassure you, “It’s him, not you.” As if that’s supposed to hinder the hurt. But pain of another loss covers you like that stained white tank top you can’t wear anymore and suddenly you can’t help but shame yourself.
You begin to question your every move. Is my hair not long enough? Or should I cut it? I knew I should have worn those pink shoes.. Am I not skinny enough? Did I say something wrong? Maybe, I should have called him…
What the hell is wrong with me?
There is nothing wrong with you
Do not question your appearance to gain acceptance from another person. Do not allow anyone to make you feel as though you have to do that. If he doesn’t recognize your worth, then he’s not someone worth fighting for. If it was meant to be then there wouldn’t be any questions or any doubts. If it were real then you would be fully accepted.
You are unique in your very own special way. Start working on what’s happening in your mind and heart. Beauty is not about having the perfect body, or the perfect face, or the perfect hair. It is about having a beautiful heart and a pure soul; it’s about being able to let go of the ones that don’t encourage you to grow, It’s about loving life and accepting it for exactly what it is.
And if nobody told you today – you are so incredibly worth it.