17 Ways To Be The Strong Woman He’s Been Looking For

iStockPhoto.com / Franck Reporter
iStockPhoto.com / Franck Reporter

1. Have Strength

Don’t talk about how strong you are. Just be strong. Endure hardships, solve problems, press on. Don’t be the dog that barks, be the dog that bites.

2. Be You

Have friends, even if he doesn’t like them. Have opinions, even if they’re different than his. Especially if they’re different.

3. Be Independent

This applies to men just as much as women, but there’s nothing sexier than someone that can take care of themselves. A relationship should be a partnership, not raising a child-like dependent.

4. Bring Something to the Table, and Demand He Do the Same

You’re valuable. Understand your value, and know what you bring into a relationship. Don’t tolerate someone looking to lounge in your life.

5. Compromise

Be opinionated and strong-willed. Don’t be a push-over, but understand the line between sticking to your guns and resolving issues. Walk that line.

6. Say What You Mean, and Mean What You Say

Dr. Seuss had the right of it. Don’t dance around issues or placate. Don’t drop hints or be assuming. Be forthright and demand the same in return.

7. Don’t Get Jealous

Relationships are about trust. You either trust him or you don’t. If you don’t, that’s an issue. Move on. If you do, that should be the end of it. Know that you’re worth the commitment, and anyone looking elsewhere isn’t worth your time.

8. Don’t Tolerate Disrespect

You need someone that will fight for you, not with you. Be respectful in return and show him how it’s done.

9. Be Reliable

If you say you’re going to do something, do it, or have a damn fine reason why you couldn’t. Expect the same of him.

10. Have Hobbies

Be a woman with interests and do them. Include him if you can, but if not, don’t stop doing what you love.

11. Have Goals

And pursue them. Be a woman with the ambition to achieve. You don’t have to move mountains, but don’t let yourself get stuck in a rut, either.

12. See the Strength in Him

Part of being strong is recognizing the strength in others. Let him know what you like about him.

13. Motivate

Be honest, but supportive. Encourage him. You just may be the first person to do so.

14. Stick Up for Yourself

If you respect yourself, he will too

15. Accept Help When You Need It

There is strength in knowing when you can’t do something on your own and asking for help, instead of constantly hitting your head against a wall.

16. When You Make a Schedule, Keep to It

If you have a class you’re taking or plans with a friend, don’t give those up to spend time with him. He’ll respect your loyalty and commitment. Fit him into your life, don’t rearrange your life around him.

17. Be Beautiful

You are beautiful, so act like it; and never let anyone convince you that you are anything less. TC mark


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  • http://girlsarenotmachines.wordpress.com Jessica

    Loved this article. Some thoughts on some of the numbers:

    2. Yes, its important to keep your sense of self but don’t let that inhibit your partners ability to be just that, a partner. Don’t simply accept a request to stop doing things, but also acknowledge there are people in your life that you should probably let go and things you should change. Let the people you trust be a guide into identifying problems. No, don’t leave your best friend because he thinks the way she talks is annoying, but also don’t continue on with a toxic “friendship” with an ex if it’s causing problems in your life and/or relationship. Basically, there are many cases where following this advice would serve to enable dysfunctional behavior, but the sentiment of it is very good.

    3. Co-dependacy is kind of a myth. The whole point of any relationship (friendship, parent, relationship, child) is for two people to be able to depend on each other to different degrees. In a partnership, you should depend on your partner a lot if you have a good relationship, but that dependance should be equal as well as healthy. If they aren’t meeting your needs, you cut them out of your life, you don’t enable them to continue doing it by pretending those needs don’t exist. A great book on this is Attached which explores why co-dependacy is a flawed and outdated relationship theory.

    7. If you don’t trust your partner, that is not necessarily a sign to move on. In many cases, it’s a sign you need to work on yourself. I have problems trusting people, but instead of blaming it on my partner I acknowledge the reality that it stems from many internal causes: my relationship with my parents, my past hurts and my highly sensitive nature. And even when a partner does something to break my trust, I have to take a moment to consider whether its something to work through or a deal breaker. Cheating, for me, is a deal breaker. Texting a friend they probably shouldn’t be texting in a way that seems flirty? That’s something to work through. Also, the amount of things to work through will change as your relationship evolves. Once you have children and a life together, sometimes cheating may be something that you work through instead of a deal breaker. Not acknowledging this can allow us to sabotage our own relationships unnecessarily.

    16. This is very good advice to stick to commitments once made, but if we are making commitments that are destructive for our relationship we might have to just admit we were wrong and break some of them. For example, if you find yourself having to agreed to work every night of the week and aren’t going to be able to see your significant other, you might have to take responsibility for overbooking yourself and losing sight of your priorities and tell your boss “I can’t come in Friday, I realized I overcommitted myself and can’t follow through.”

    Really great article that got me thinking! xoxo

  • http://perfectlyimperfectwoman.com gemini1974

    Love this!!

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