This Is Why The Kindest People You Know Are Also The Strongest

Pham Khoai

You probably have this impression stuck in your head:

Nice people are weak.

They get taken advantage of, get blamed at, and are often pushed around. You’d think every bad incident would crush their kind soul and break them down, to the point where they’d start questioning why they should even try.

I hate to bring this up, but this is what I’ve been through from day 1.

Friends would ask me for rides without offering back. My dad would yell at me for giving a tip too high, even when I honestly felt the server gave the best service I’d had in my life. My ex would talk over me during an argument, because I did not want to fight.

There’s a lot more scenarios I could add where I chose the mellow route. I never liked the outcome, but soaked up all of my bitterness and told myself I’d be better the next day. After all, it was just a temporary occasion.

Little did I know, every struggle I went through, I became stronger inside. Every tear drop, every heart break, every burning pain in my gut — I took that all in and tossed it aside, ready to face the next big hurdle. It’s something unheard of when people think about the nice me, simply because they don’t see it.

I just do it.

“The strongest people are not those who show strength infront of us but those who win battles we know nothing about.” — Unknown

Now I’m not the only nice person around. There’s many more who’ve learned to get out of the pits and build upon their weaknesses when faced with a crappy situation. Quite frankly, it’s the only choice they have. And it’s this self-taught resilience combined with the choice of staying nice that make nice people the strongest kind.

Here’s what I mean.

They fight hard to succeed.

The nicest people have suffered through some of the darkest, most horrifying moments one can ever imagine. But it’s mishaps like these that toughen their mind and steer them to take control of their own life. A life where they no longer beg for respect, but earn it. A life where people admire their work ethics to building a secure and balanced life, rather than just their niceness.

No matter what nice people may encounter, they use their hard past to break through hurdles and succeed. Anything to avoid their previous (unpleasant) situation.

They’re not afraid of confronting rough emotions.

The nicest people understand how sadness, disappointment, loss, and failure truly feels like, because it has happened to them on a very deep level. This makes it easier for them to listen to those who’ve suffered from a similar experience and understand how they’re feeling.

It’s not a comfortable topic to talk about, for most, but nice people have learned how to cope with rough emotions (including their own). Eventually, everything around them becomes a bit more tolerable — losing a job, moving away from loved ones, making a thousand dollar mistake. They might cry over these emotions, but at the end of the day, they grow thicker skin and become more forward with their thoughts and actions.

They love unconditionally.

The nicest people have had their heart ripped to pieces numerous times. And it’s something they never want others to feel, especially when it’s people they care most about like their partner, family, and friends.

You might not notice at first, or even at all, but nice people always think about everyone else and what they can do to make them happy, even at the expense of their own needs. It’s a tough life, having double the responsibility of caring for others while caring for themselves. Not many people can love unconditionally like this and stay sane — only the strong can.

They accept everyone and help them.

The nicest people put themselves in everyone’s shoes. They know how bad it feels for people who get mocked for being too short, being overweight, having a big nose or big ears. They understand life isn’t fair. People aren’t perfect. Why pick on those who never asked to carry those unfortunate traits?

Your world becomes better when you accept people as they are and help them get over their struggles. For one, you’ll build better relationships with others. Secondly, you’ll feel empowered by your dedication to help those who’ve struggled like you. This is what drives nice people to keep doing what they’re doing.
So if you’re nice…

Stay that way.

People might not recognize your strengths at first, but they will once they’ve seen you break through the toughest barrier with a strong heart. Thought Catalog Logo Mark

I write what I feel.

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