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This Is Why We Write About You (Even After We Promise Not To)
Regardless of how it may seem, we don’t make these promises for the sole purpose of breaking them a while down the line. Though in the back of our minds we’re certain that we’ll eventually give in and plaster the metaphors we’ve converted your smile into all over a sheet of paper.
19 Honest Things I Learned About Grief When I Lost My Fiancé

The grief and sadness stay with you. You just get better (Much better. Become a pro, even) at hiding it from other people.