portrait photography of woman wearing knitted top

It’s Time To Let Your Guard Down

What would it feel like to let your walls down? Put your guard down?

Would you feel afraid and misunderstood, or would you feel confident and brave? Would you feel fragile and delicate, or would you feel powerful and free? Would you feel cold without your armor or warm from the blanket of possibilities?

For me, I spent years building a castle for and around myself. I’ve built walls to protect myself, a fortress that reminds me to keep boundaries, and windows that get that perfect early-morning light but are still hurricane proof.

I’ve been proud of this protection and the self-reflection and self-discovery it took to build this foundation from the ground up. I’ve been grateful for the defense and proud of my resilience, my courage, and my certitude.

But every once in a while, I let my guard down. Put my walls down. Open the windows—even if it’s just for a moment.

And here’s the thing: it feels good to let the walls fall. I feel lighter, assured, and drunk from hope. When I let my guard down, it feels like there are beautiful and sparkling parts of me that were just waiting to come up for air. It’s almost as if I meet a version of myself that has been hibernating, euphoric to be back in the real world as someone new.

And moments like that remind me that as great as it is to be confident, firm, and fortified, it can feel just as good to be naive, flexible, and free. It’s moments like these that show me that even if nothing comes out of these barriers faltering, it feels good to be open to more than just the partitions you’re enclosed in.

Sure, you risk a storm coming through your door. Sure, it’s easier to keep the locks in place. Sure, there’s a chance you even make a fool of yourself. But you know the great thing about fools? They’re not afraid to be themselves. And there’s a part of you the world deserves to see behind the screen, foolish as it may be.

You deserve your castle as much as you deserve the flexibility to feel something wild and new and unexpectedly wonderful. You can be proud of your strength while also being vulnerable and raw and real, because that requires strength too. You can be both, and it feels exciting to explore the balance between the two.

So, by all means, build a castle for your heart and a home for your soul. By all means, be proud of your safeguards, your self-made shelter, and your vindication. But please, by all means, don’t close yourself off from the world in doing so.

Because even if you sometimes get your hopes up, only to see your hopes fall, it’s moments like these that will remind you that you have what it takes to fly.

So, I wonder, what would it feel like to let your walls down? Put your guard down? Maybe it’s time you opened up the windows and let the light in.

About the author

Sonya Matejko

Writer, Founder & Poet