To The Best Friend I Lost

As this new year begins, I want you to know that I love you. No matter how far we both have drifted away, I will always care for you. We don’t talk to each other like we used to but I still value you. You will not be forgotten. People say that losing your lover is the worst heartbreak ever. But losing a best friend hurts just the same, may be a little less or even a little more. It does hurt and does make you cry. Your best friend is the person you talked to about every little things in your life about. You talk to her about how bad the fight with your partner was, about how your mother shouted at you, about exactly how much sugar you like in your coffee and also about which exact fragrance makes you happy and which food makes you want to throw up. She is the person you trust when you are drunk, you speed-dial when at a crisis and the first person to express your happiness to. She listens to you and doesn’t judge you but is also the one to shout at you. And you allow it because she also happens to be the person to dance it out with. So don’t you tell me that losing her didn’t take away a part of you! There came distance and other people lingered in. We both thought we were busy and ego played its part while secretly wishing for the other to reach out. Many a times did I feel betrayed and angry. But I want you to know that I will never forget how special you made me feel. I will never forget the times when you held my hand and believed in me. The torn thread of friendship may not be grieved upon anymore but will definitely strike me hard when reminded. Times when I see your photo with someone new aches my heart because now I don’t get to know you. I don’t get to hear the laughter, have those sleepovers and the late night phone calls with incessant chattering. I am used to it by now and I don’t sit and weep about it but I cannot help those few drops of tears on my eyelids from trickling down when the memories of happy times come across. I miss having you to be excited for my birthday more than I am because no matter who came in, yours is a place unable to be filled in by anyone. I miss how are quarrels couldn’t last and bitching couldn’t stop. You were my shoulder. You were my person. And, no matter how much we move on, a part of me will never stop missing you. I will always be thankful for every time you stood up for me, for every tear turned into smile and mostly for being you, my best friend, my abode. And even though we are now strangers who are not compatible, yours are memories I will always cherish and never trade for the world. Maybe forever could not be our tag, but you are still the best thing that I could have. And, I will always love you.