Ladies Aren’t Letting Good Guys Pass Them By; Guys Just Need To Man Up And Say Hi

Noël Alva
Noël Alva

Not so long ago, this article had some really insightful views on why he thinks us ladies might still be single. This was very interesting and thought provoking; so thank you Matthew, who penned it. Before I knew it, my thoughts and ramblings were tumbling out of me, and I couldn’t help but respond and tell you exactly why I don’t believe that I’m letting a single good man pass me by.

If you think I’m hot, but you cannot find it in yourself to dig deep and roll up on me and say something, anything (as long as ‘anything’ is not some kind of a racial slur); in my eyes, you’re really not what I would label as a ‘good man’. The man I’m looking for will always be brave, especially in the moments he is most fearful. You see, by giving me eye contact here and there from across the bar, or ‘subtly’ edging your way nearer to me & my friends, but not actually coming over and introducing yourself; you are telling me a whole lot about yourself without even saying a word.

We’re not looking to be approached by a Joey Tribbiani type with a belt full of notches, and a bucket full of swag. If you’re shy, be shy – don’t change yourself for me. Don’t change yourself for anyone. If we’re being honest, a guy could throw out the smoothest lines going and we might not even bat an eyelid, because, attraction is different for every single person. What’s always flattering is the compliment of you, aka a total stranger, coming over to another total stranger, and attempting to strike up a conversation out of thin air.

I worry you guys are simply too lazy sometimes? Even if you really like a girl, often you end wigging out, keeping your mouth shut, and letting her walk in and straight back out of your life; and then whining and mumbling something about how ‘good guys’ always finish last. How many times are you gonna keep doing that before you think ‘fuck it, I absolutely have to talk to this one’?

Finding the bottle to approach the opposite sex is the ONE thing you guys have to do. The one thing. Man the fuck up.

We already deal with so much shit you can’t even begin to imagine: plastering on the latest shit that Maybelline have brought out, so we look & feel attractive enough to ourselves, yes, but also to you; harassment, just for crossing the road on the way to work. Then there’s also periods every single month, and erm… oh yeah – HAVING YOUR BABIES. I’ll leave it there.

Yeah, we might reject you. But that’s what dating is, my friends. A string of rejections or acceptances. And you won’t know unless you try… who was it that said you miss 100% of the shots you don’t take? Listen to them. And anyway, if I reject you, I will always do it nicely, because I’m able to empathise, and also – I’m not a total witch. If a girl goes out of her way to shoot you down when you’re vulnerable, then you dodged a whopper of a bullet there, so give thanks for that, and pray for someone better next time. No need to go cry in a corner and never talk to a girl again.

See, that wasn’t too painful, was it?

Bro, you got this.

Get on out there and make a total strangers day by telling her you think she’s beautiful. Mean it. Don’t be skeezy. And you’ll do great. I don’t know a sister who wouldn’t melt on the spot. We all dig that shit.

Find the courage and go and talk to her. Who knows, you might end up marrying her someday… TC mark

Shani Jay

I hold a mirror to your soul, so you can see how beautiful you are

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