Thought Catalog

10 Best Things About Being Single

  • 0

1. Not being required to care about anyone’s opinion.

Let’s be honest: Even though we constantly have people around us telling us how not okay or how awesome our various decisions are, when in a relationship you’re somewhat obligated to take someone else’s feelings consistently into account. Thinking of doing something new, making some kind of change, or going out and doing something tonight? Yeah, you’re going to have to check in with headquarters if you’re a member of a couple — especially jealous couples, which are more common than we’d like to admit, unfortunately. But when you’re single, you do exactly what you want, when you want. You enjoy the hell out of your spontaneous vacations, wanton flirting, and trying something new every day with impunity. It’s awesome.

2. Moving at a moment’s notice.

If there is one thing that can be impeded by having a stable relationship that you care about, it’s the zip code in which you live being able to change. Everything from a new job opportunity to a town you thought looked cool on an episode of Anthony Bourdain’s show can bring you into a new place, and if you’re tied down, that decision is going to have to be made as a team. Unless, of course, you want to enter into a long-distance relationship, but that’s a can of worms to be opened on another day. So enjoy singledom! Move to Austin on a whim! Take a look at Portland and maybe decide you’re too normal for it! Don’t worry, you can always go somewhere else tomorrow.

3. Enjoying your friends.

Why is it that we always seem to forget about our friends when we get overwhelmed with a hot new relationship? We act like they’re some kind of weight we’ve been lugging around on our shoulders that, as soon as we find someone perfect to snuggle with on weekend afternoons, we just drop at a moment’s notice. And while we do come to our senses eventually and find a balance between relationship and friends, there are still few pleasures as pure as spending days, nights, and a series of bad decisions with friends while you’re single, young, and trying to figure things out together. Being single allows you to focus your full attention on the love you have with your friends, so why not take them out on a nice date once in a while?

4. Life is an open book.

Tomorrow could be the day you meet the love of your life, the day you get an opportunity that takes you halfway around the world, the day you decide you want to make a huge change and just go for it. There are no expectations ahead of you — no goalposts that need to be passed with your significant other — and you can decide exactly how you want to do things. Possibility for you, and you alone, is endless.

5. Dating.

Yeah, we can all complain about dating, but let’s admit it: there is something thrilling about the promise and mystery of a first date. You get to find someone, go through the butterfly-inducing contact that leads up to your meeting, and then finally doll yourself up for a night on the town that could either end in marriage or complaining about how they were a terrible kisser over drinks with your friends. And while the dating scene can definitely get exhausting — and we can start to think that we’re doomed to repeat the same lame evenings out over and over — being single affords you the freedom to take your time and learn what you like, through often-absurd trial and error.

6. Getting to know yourself.

We can be so hard on ourselves, and maybe a big part of that is because just spending extended time alone with yourself is… surprisingly hard. Going to dinner alone, taking long walks, and doing a little exploring with no one there to talk to can seem intimidating, even not worth it. But when you actually get to the point where your own quiet company is enough to have a great time, and you don’t need — even if you may like — the crowds and other voices in your ear, life becomes infinitely more enjoyable. And more importantly, when you do date someone, it won’t be because you need to fill some kind of void, because you can’t stand to just be alone with yourself.

7. Parties for one!

Have you ever just had a “single” night where you get drunk by yourself and watch movies, play around online, eat junk food, and remain entirely unconcerned with what you look like? They’re the best. Sometimes it’s nice to know that you can do exactly what you want to do, and find out that having yourself as a drinking partner sometimes doesn’t have to be depressing or just a filler until something better comes along. And this is made all the better when you know that no one is expecting you to give them your time and do something with them instead. Being able to just enjoy a night of fun that you maybe wouldn’t want anyone else to see (we maybe don’t look our very best when eating out of a bowl of Doritos perched on our tummies while watching cooking shows) with no expectations is criminally underrated.

8. Only one set of parents to worry about.

Admit it, parents can be stressful enough when they’re just yours, the ones you are used to and at least know, no matter what, still love you. Add to that being with someone you love and want to impress, whose parents are now going to bring some final judgment down on you as a person, and — if all goes well — are going to be family for the rest of your life, even if you dislike each other openly. I want to take a Xanax just thinking about it.

9. Not having to worry about grooming.

Do you want to spend the whole weekend unshowered and in the same pajamas you put on on Friday? Do you want to not shave your legs/crotch/beard/underarms/whatever part of you usually gets shaved, or at least trimmed, if someone else is going to be touching it? Do you want to burp and fart and masturbate with complete and utter liberty? Do you want to walk around naked eating hummus with your fingers straight out of the container? Well, the single life is for you! Enjoy, Smelly!

10. Being able to focus on your career.

Having a career, and everything that comes with it — from managing your own money to having your own place to live — is scary, and challenging, but one of the most adult things we do. Knowing that we can rely entirely on ourselves, that we can make our careers and our work/life balance what we want them to be, makes entering into any relationship just that much better. When we’re alone, we can focus on building that nest of security (both financial and professional) that ensures we will not need to rely on anyone else — that we don’t have to be scared. Taking the time, while we have it, to make our career dreams come true, is an investment that pays off the rest of our lives. TC mark

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More From Thought Catalog

10 Best Things About Being Single is cataloged in , , , , ,
  • morgan

    Coming out of a 3 year relationship about three months ago, I’m almost positive I wrote this. But you beat me to it. And it was perfect. Loved 1,3 and 10.

  • http://www.facebook.com/joe.dinardo Joe DiNardo

    Alternate title: “10 Excuses I Use to Feel Better About Being Alone”

    • H

      Wow. Douche.

      • Dan

        not excuses, things that are actually enjoyable. Just as there are things that are enjoyable and things that are crappy when you are in a relationship. You’re one of those people that would add more to the world being quiet

    • Erika

      Your an idiot you probably just pissed because your stuck in a jealous controlling relationship.

    • Slutta

      Haha!

    • Hry

      Joe nailed it.

    • Dasha

      We’re all alone Joe, we’re all alone.

  • Jk

    Cue “10 Best Things About Being In A Relationship.” Sigh.

  • Sarah

    loved this one :) finally one article about being single that I actually can relate to and that doesnt make me feel depressed but empowered. And a good perspective on being an adult, I’m tired of 20 something people that insist on never becoming adults

  • Danii

    God I really hate other people’s parents/families. It’s literally the worst part about being in a relationship. I point blank refuse to meet them.

  • FrostBiteMe

    Right on target! I find relationships to be overrated, but that’s just me.

  • http://gravatar.com/onyae onyae

    I needed to read this !! I loved it all. Especially number 6. That is truly important. Thanks for writing this

  • xeleion

    You can date and do all of these things.

    • http://theyuppiediaries.wordpress.com theyuppiediaries

      Yes.

    • Alex

      Yeeeah but some people don’t want to.

    • http://www.facebook.com/joe.dinardo Joe DiNardo

      Exactly. With the exception of 2 (which let’s be honest how many people can ACTUALLY do that anyway) and 5 (obviously)

  • elevendeuce11

    i hate to be the “relationship” comment, but as someone in a relationship ha, i’ve never had to worry about #’s 1-10 on this list. my bf & i have enough of an understanding to not be dramatically concerned about each others feelings [plans change, so what? just let me know!], we live together & had no trouble moving/switching zip codes, i’ve never neglected my friends/always make time for them, we set individual goals & always support one another, i have plenty of parties of 1 because we actually have personal time/we’re not attached at the hip, i love his parents/family, he doesn’t care when i am lax on grooming, and we also support each other in our careers. i’m sure being single can be awesome & a great time to explore your individuality, but if people ever had to worry about these things in past relationships or these things were an issue, i gotta say, maybe they were in the wrong relationship? or maybe i’m just lucky. either way, nice piece!

    • Hailey

      good thing you have an amazing relationship and you may look down on all us sad, single people and tell us how it’s done. yawn.

      • Josh

        Hahahaha, top comment Hailey.

      • elevendeuce11

        no no no. not looking down on single people at all. just feeling bad for anyone who stresses about the things on this list, especially if they are in a relationship & feel that these things are issues/things they miss or had to compromise themselves for. being single is great. so is being in a relationship where these things aren’t even an issue or missed- that’s all i was trying to say.

    • SlugHole

      You are so right! Being single has it’s up sides, but being in a healthy, loving relationship where you can be your open (and sometimes stinky) self can’t be beat :)

  • Joe

    Number Seven is my favorite, but you forgot to add “dancing obnoxiously in your underwear” or something to that effect.

    Otherwise, pretty fab.

  • Austinite

    Only problem with this. Please, please, PLEASE don’t move to Austin on a whim. There are enough people doing that, and none of y’all know how to drive correctly.

  • http://lionessyawn.wordpress.com lionessyawn

    Reblogged this on dykes & diatribes / texan testiness and commented:
    La vie seule, c’est le mieux.

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  • Sam

    Jeeez, all we’re gonna get here is people in relationships going “I do all of this anyway, because my relationship is soooo amazing!”

    • tiff

      lol totally.
      I sincerely believe most people are in relationships because they can’t stand being alone.
      why else would someone jump from one person to the other within, like, two months? *sigh*

      • Sam

        Ugh, serial monogamists are. the. worst.

      • x

        one of my good friends is on the road to engagement and here i am thinking ‘wtf, did i do anything wrong? im SINGLE.’ then i remembered she was a serial monogamist. then i feel a little better.

    • Sarah

      this is not a fight between people in relationships and people single, and it’s also not a piece on how much better it is to be single. It’s more of a “if you are in this situation do the best with it, enjoy the good parts”. I would love to have the perfect relationship some people on here seem to say they have (what is not true anyhow, cause there’s not such thing as a perfect relationship) but it so happens I’ve been hurt and I’m single. It’s good to wake up and not think my life totally sucks because of it. And that is all.

  • http://breathingliberty.wordpress.com breathingliberty

    This is pure genius! I love how you hit it right at the heart, and I couldn’t agree with you more. This is exactly what I feel about the perks of being single, and I think more people should be reminded of these benefits. TERRIFIC POST. I’m completely speechless now.

  • Fenestella

    I agree this article makes some good points. With that said, you can be in a romantic relationship and still have fun with friends, learn new things about yourself, focus on your career, etc. It is unfortunate that so many people in their 20s involve themselves in these overly serious, almost obsessive relationships.

    Being single is awesome. But being in a relationship that allows you to still live life like a normal 24 year old is really great too!

  • http://crapodelic.blogspot.com Naomi

    I love this article! I’ve been single for more than a year now and I am enjoying the fact that I don’t need someone’s consent to do anything.

  • S.Jones

    I am in a ltr but goddamn do I do #9 like a champ

  • http://lotterynumbersuk.com Elohor

    Hi, I am grateful very much for your blog, I think they are really inspiring and really an eye opener, I really love the concept that you bring into blogging, I have a website as well, and you have just inspired me to do better.
    Cheers!!!

  • Sara

    I totally agree that people need to embrace their single periods in there life. It’s the time when you get to explore life and find out who you really are. I know so many people who jump from relationship to relationship and never give themselves time to just be one with themselves . They always wonder why they are unhappy in the relationships. You can’t depend on someone else to make you happy if you can’t make make yourself happy. I have had the greatest times in my life when I was single and free to be to just be me. I am married now, but I think that people still need to hold on to theses things even after they find love. I value my me time as much as I value having someone who is there for me. You gotta make the best out of every situation in your life :-)

  • shalini

    do not agree with it in all – and think that one can do all of this while being in a relationship..as for looking after two sets of parents – why not – why are becoming selfish…….

    • http://twitter.com/dianasalier diana salier (@dianasalier)

      sure, one can. but most don’t.

  • delight

    thank you! although there must be something there about the wonderful joys of getting really high alone in your underpants while tripping on music, food, art, whatever floats your boat with absolute freedom. Other than that, pretty much enjoyed the writing :)

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    Reblogged this on myshoesmylife and commented:
    current lifestyle & loving it.

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