woman leaning on rail

If You Feel Like You Can’t Commit To Anything, Read This

I know you’ve been seeing people everywhere committing to partners, jobs, or certain careers in general. I know that you noticed that people around you have been choosing to stay at places where they can call home—a certain house or even a certain city or country where they want to continue their lives in. I know that you’ve never felt or experienced that in your life.

You’ve never felt the urge to commit to someone. You’ve never been in a relationship or met someone where you wanted to fully commit and build a future with that person. I know you’ve been juggling from one job to another. You’ve been switching careers and you’ve never quite felt like there’s a certain job or a certain career that you want to commit to fully. You’ve lived in different countries and cities, but still you’ve never felt like you belong anywhere. You don’t even feel like you belong to your current home.

The idea that there must be something wrong with you has popped in your head too many times by now. And you keep asking yourself, “Why can’t you just commit to anything or anyone?”  Even people around you are starting to wonder, “Why haven’t you settled down yet?”

What I hope you know is the reason why you haven’t committed to anyone yet is that you’ve never met someone who felt quite right; because when the right person comes along, you’ll find yourself willing to commit no matter what commitment issues you have and no matter how much you fear commitment. Because actually, when that person comes along, you’ll find yourself wanting them so much and wanting to actually be with them that you would find yourself slowly dropping all your fears aside and choosing to be with them despite any fears or any issues that you might have.

And the thing is, when you find something that you’re crazy about and a dream that you want to chase so badly, you actually wake up every day to work for it without even thinking about it—because it satisfies you so much that you’d find yourself actually putting in the work, effort, and time till you make it happen, because you want it that much.

And one day in your life you’re going to go somewhere where it will make you feel at home, where it will make you feel like this is it. This is where you belong, this is where you want to actually live. The truth is you haven’t been to that place yet. You haven’t been to your actual home yet.

There’s nothing wrong with you. Just because some people have found partners that they are willing to commit to earlier than you, or a certain lifestyle that they love, or a place where they can call home and picture their lives in, or a dream that they can call their own and settle for, doesn’t mean that there’s something up with you. It just means that you haven’t found these things yet.

Your time will come. Keep searching and keep looking. Your partner, your dream, and your home is out there waiting for you somewhere.

I want to write about you, me, and all of us.

Keep up with Rowan on Instagram, Twitter, TikTok and Website