If I’m Being Honest, I’m Glad You Picked Her

Maybe I was upset at first,
maybe I questioned myself,
maybe I wanted revenge —
I wanted to show you I’m better.

But now that some time has passed
I’m glad you picked her.
I’m glad I wasn’t your first choice.
I’m glad you let me go.

Because that means I don’t have to suffer.
I don’t have to wonder who you’re with.
I don’t have to believe your lies.
I don’t have to fight so hard for your attention.

I can go to sleep knowing I’m not being fooled,
you’re not playing games with me,
you’re not cheating on me,
you’re not making me cry.

Because it’s only a matter of time
before you break her heart.
It’s only a matter of time
before she sees you with someone else.

It’s not a competition for me anymore,
she didn’t win and I didn’t lose.
It’s all temporary
because you’re not looking for forever.

So if I’m being honest, I’m glad it wasn’t me.
I’m glad I wasn’t your temporary choice.
I’m glad you didn’t pick me for another heartbreak.
I’m glad I finally understood why we never worked out.

Because it shows me that it’s pointless,
wanting to be loved by someone who doesn’t care,
trying to win someone who doesn’t mind losing you,
crying over someone who doesn’t try to make you smile.

It’s not about her anymore,
even if you think she’s better than me.
It’s about me now
and who thinks I’m the best for him.

Rania Naim is a poet and author of the new book All The Words I Should Have Said, available here.