This Is What You’re Really Asking For When You Say 'Let’s Just Be Friends'

This Is What You’re Really Asking For When You Say ‘Let’s Just Be Friends’

 Arkady Lifshits
Arkady Lifshits

When you ask if we could be friends, this is what you’re really asking for:

You’re asking me to talk to you about other guys and maybe ask for your advice, you’re asking me to spend my late nights with someone else, to stay up on the phone with someone else and maybe one day I’ll cancel on you because I have a date.

You’re asking me to take back my good morning and good night texts, my undivided attention, you’re telling me it’s okay if I’m not always there for you, you’re letting me get away with not putting you first and you’re telling me that it’s okay to give all my loving to someone else while you’re there watching.

You’re giving me the opportunity to start seeing other men as more than friends, you’re giving me the time to get to know others on a deeper level and you’re giving me the chance to fall in love with someone else.

When you say let’s be friends, you’re asking me to hurt you. You’re asking me to show you what you could have had but chose to lose.

When you say let’s be friends, you’re really asking me to show you how we can’t be friends and how we never were.

When you say let’s be friends, you’re saying I’m okay with losing you as both a lover and a friend.

You’re saying it’s okay to watch me leave and be with someone else and you can’t say anything about it.

Because you will realize that you had the chance, that this could’ve been you if only you tried harder, if only you weren’t so guarded, if only you didn’t use timing as an excuse, if only you had let your emotions guide you that one time…..you can’t say anything but ‘if only’ and I can’t say anything but ‘I told you so.’

When you say let’s be friends you’re asking for an invitation to my wedding day or maybe no invitation at all.

When you say let’s be friends, I don’t think you know what this means. I don’t think you understand how it will change everything between us or how it will change me.

When you say let’s be friends, you’re asking me to leave you alone, to leave you lonely, to warm someone else up as you stay alone in the cold.

When you say let’s be friends, you’re saying goodbye.

So let me ask you, is that what you really want? Thought Catalog Logo Mark

Writing makes me feel alive. Words heal me.

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