All The Things I Noticed That I Didn’t Tell You

I noticed the day the way you looked at me changed and how your words were not as meaningful as they used to.

I noticed the day you talked about her and I noticed the sadness in your eyes; the sadness of somebody who misses someone they can’t have.

I noticed the way you tried to divert the attention to me when you wanted to evade my intrusive questions.

I noticed the night you looked confused and lost and wanted to just run away from it all.

I noticed how your messages became shorter and the tone was not as exciting.

I noticed how your voice grew colder and how you slowly lost your enthusiasm.

I noticed the moment it all changed when your mind was somewhere else; thinking of something else or someone else.

I noticed it how it all began and I noticed how it all ended.

But I also noticed myself.

I noticed the way I was getting attached to someone who’s unavailable.

I noticed how effortlessly I opened up and started sharing my secrets.

I noticed the way I smiled whenever I heard your name and how I told my friends that I don’t really care that much.

I noticed the way I started caring more and how all I wanted was to be there for you.

I noticed the little things I said and the little things I did that I wouldn’t say or do to anyone and I noticed the little things you did too before it all changed.

I noticed the progression and I noticed the deterioration.

I noticed the rise and I noticed the fall.

I noticed how I stopped knowing the details of your life and how you no longer wanted to share them with me.

And I noticed how quickly people can become strangers.

I noticed everything but I never said a word.

I noticed that you noticed too.

But there is one thing you didn’t notice — how I can easily walk away.

I don’t think you noticed that I could easily walk away if I’m not appreciated and I can easily leave even though I want to stay.

I don’t think you noticed that I’ve been bruised before so nothing really cuts deep anymore and I don’t think you noticed that I no longer break when things don’t work out.

I don’t think you noticed that one day you can mean the world to me and the next day you can be just a faded memory.

I don’t think you noticed that you can easily go from everything to nothing.  Thought Catalog Logo Mark

Rania Naim

Writing makes me feel alive. Words heal me.

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