Dear Mom, I Forgot To Tell You How Much I Love You

Dear Mom, I Forgot To Tell You How Much I Love You

Dear Mom,

I apologize if I don’t take every chance I have to say I love, I apologize if sometimes I act like I don’t, I apologize for the times I made your life harder.

But I love you. So much. Unconditionally.

I love you even when I am arguing with you over the silliest thing just to prove a point. I know you are always right but I have to show you that I have my own voice, that I have my own words, that I don’t have to follow everything you say even if it’s the right thing. I’m trying to learn from my own mistakes. I’m trying to be myself — just like you taught me.

I love you even when I hide things from you or keep secrets from you. I don’t want you to worry about me. I know you won’t sleep at night, so I’m sparing you the anxiety. I keep things from you because I love you not because I don’t trust you. And trust me, you’ve got nothing to worry about. I got this.

I love you even when I don’t agree with your decisions. You’re too kind sometimes, too forgiving, too understanding, too gentle and too accommodating and it drives me crazy. But I understand why you do it, I understand how big your heart is and how strong you are and I understand why you don’t want to leave people feeling unloved.

I sometimes forget that you know what you’re doing, I sometimes forget that your wisdom and love surpasses what my heart can feel and what my mind can comprehend.

I love you even when I’m mad at you. Even when I don’t think you make sense. Even when I tell you that I don’t like you, I love you. Your words hurt more because they’re true and sometimes I want to believe my lies. I know they’re lies but they make me feel better. Let me believe them sometimes, I will figure them out later. I promise.

I love you even when I’m away, when I go months without seeing you. I miss you even though I don’t always tell you.

Your hug still warms me up the most and my tears somehow dry faster in your arms. I love you because your love is still and will always be the greatest love anyone has ever given me.

I’m sorry if I don’t tell you I love you more often, I’m sorry if I sometimes forget that you need love also, that you want to be nurtured too, and that you need to be taken care of instead. I forget because you never ask for it, you’re always giving and loving as if your satisfaction comes from the love you give rather than the love you receive.

I love you even if you never ask for my love. I love you because you’re the reason why I’m living and you’re the reason why I’m surviving. So if I get too rebellious or too busy or too stubborn, just remember that I love you.

So if I ever forget to say it when you need to hear it the most….I love you. Thought Catalog Logo Mark

Writing makes me feel alive. Words heal me.

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