12 Women Reveal The One Thing They Learned From Their Almost Relationships

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1. Don’t do it!

“It’s the worst feeling in the world. Not knowing if you two are together, not knowing if you can take him to your best friend’s wedding, not knowing if you’re actually the only one – it’s just a terrible feeling and it doesn’t get any better.” — Emily, 25

2. Guys just live in the moment.

“I think women are just more emotional and we think far ahead, guys just don’t care. They can continue to ‘hang out’ with you if they’re having fun without defining anything for as long as they can. They like to enjoy the moment without worrying about the future.” —  Jenn, 24

3. If you want a serious relationship, you have to make that clear.

“I was in an almost relationship for 6 months, holding on to the hope that somehow it will turn into something serious, but when I brought it up to him, he told me that he won’t settle down anytime soon. I was really hurt because I thought that our connection was getting better and stronger, but I guess he really didn’t feel the same way. I wish I had brought it up earlier before investing months and months into it.” — Sofia, 28

4. Just because it worked for your friend doesn’t mean it will work for you.

“It worked for my friend and the guy she was dating ended up committing to her, which gave me hope that it will be the same for me. NOPE. Don’t assume that it will work for you too because it’s a very tricky situation and very few people get what they truly want out of it.” — Denise, 26

5. Blame it on the dating apps.

“I honestly think if it wasn’t for all these dating apps, men would be more willing to commit. I knew the guy I was almost dating was still on Tinder but I didn’t think he was using it, but he was using it and apparently using Bumble too. No man will commit when he has access to a bunch of attractive women a few miles away. I hate those apps, I wish they were never invented.” — Brie 23

6. It’s fun only if you want to take things slow.

“If you’re the ultimate chill girl who wants to take things slow, it will actually be better for you. I know this is how I felt because I wasn’t ready to jump into anything serious after my long-term relationship ended but I missed having someone around, so it was the perfect balance, but I can understand why it would be frustrating for someone who wants a real relationship – it’s nothing like it.” — Christina, 27

7. It’s a waste of time.

“It’s a waste of time, a waste of money, a waste of feelings and just a waste. You either want a relationship or you don’t, you either want to be with me or you don’t, this whole ‘almost’ thing is just another excuse or an invention to sleep with someone regularly without making it sound like a booty call. Why buy the milk when you can get the cow for free? This is exactly what an almost relationship is.” — Hannah, 26

8. You will get attached no matter what.

“I know you think you don’t want anything and you’re also in it just to have fun but you will. This is just how we’re wired. After a few romantic dates and after you sleep with him, that’s it, you’re attached honey and it’s going to hurt when it ends.” — Mary, 25

9. Do you really want to be half-loved?

“The biggest take away was the value I put on myself. Do I really want to be loved like that? Is this the kind of love I wished for when I was a little girl? It just got to a point where I felt half-loved and I started to be okay with it, then I snapped out of it because this is settling even if you’re crazy about the guy, you’re settling for the bare minimum and you deserve the maximum. Love should be whole not almost.” — Brenda, 29

10. I enjoyed it because I didn’t really have strong feelings for him.

“I think I liked it because I wasn’t really that into him honestly, I was just dating for the heck of it. It’s like friends with benefits; fun and easy but it will not go anywhere. I would do it again if I’ve been single for a while and want to get back in the dating game.” — Amy, 24

11. Just make sure you’re the only one at least.

“I mean I’m all for taking thing slow and men taking their time to develop feelings but just make sure he is not having other almost relationships at the same time. I don’t know how they do it, but some guys can juggle dating multiple women at the same time. I found out that the guy I was dating was dating a few other women for months too and it was crazy. I don’t know how they do it. I don’t know why they do it!” — Kim, 25

12. Almost is another word for NO.

“No it’s not an almost, it’s a ‘No.’ After my almost relationship ended, the man I was dating moved on and started ‘exclusively’ dating another girl and he was all over her, it made me realize that he was ready to commit but I just wasn’t the right one for him, which means that this whole time he was stringing me along because he wasn’t sure how he felt about me. If a man likes you, trust me, he will want to lock you down and he won’t risk losing you or stand seeing you with anyone else. Almost is another word for ‘No.’ ” — Linda, 27. TC mark

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Nothing terrifies me more than being so close to someone and then watching them become a stranger again

Nothing scares me more than someone loving me one day and deciding they don’t want me the next. Nothing terrifies me more than being so close to someone and then watching them become a stranger again.

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  • http://annstvincent.com Ann St. Vincent

    These are a great set of quotes – and they apply to any age. Even in my 40s, dating after divorce, I’ve gotten caught in “almost” relationships, as have some of my friends. Intellectually knowing it is one thing; doing something about it is the key.

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