1. You’re not excited to see him. The excitement you had when you first met him fizzled out quickly and now you are neutral – even nonchalant about his texts. You’re not bothered if he doesn’t make plans to see you or if you go weeks without seeing him. There’s a lack of passion.
2. You don’t try to know more personal things about him. When you see him, you are not genuinely interested in getting to know him personally or know more about his values and his ambitions. Your conversations are more casual than deep and you are not trying to change the tone.
3. You don’t flirt as much. You don’t send flirty texts or compliment his looks, you don’t try to slightly touch him or make him laugh. You talk to him like you talk to a friend, you enjoy hanging out with him but it doesn’t feel special or exhilarating. The chemistry is dull.
4. You don’t miss him. If you go all day without hearing from him, or if you go weeks without seeing him, you don’t really think about it as much and it doesn’t bother you like it normally would. He crosses your mind occasionally – but that’s it.
5. You’re not progressive about the relationship. You are complacent, you don’t want it to move too fast – or maybe at all. You don’t nurture it to grow or evolve. You don’t put in the effort to propel the relationship forward.
6. You would rather spend time with your friends than see him. Time flies when you’re having fun – with your friends. You feel that your time together is good but not great. You look forward to girl’s night more than your dates with him.
7. You’re hesitant about him. You don’t know for sure if he is right for you, you don’t know what you will say if he says he wants to be with you or meet his family. You’re unsure of him more than you are sure of him.
8. You’re open to dating other people. You haven’t completely brushed off other men, you are still keeping your options somewhat open. You have a gut feeling that you can find someone else more suitable for you.
9. You’re not letting him in. You don’t share things with him, you don’t tell him about your work updates, or the argument you had with your friend or your future travel plans. You don’t look for ways to include him in your interests. You are still not comfortable being completely yourself around him and making him part of your life.
10. You feel like you’re settling. If liking him doesn’t come naturally to you, then you are settling. If you like him because he’s ‘good on paper,’ then you are settling. If he doesn’t make you feel something you’ve never felt before, then you are settling.