Don’t you wish there was a fast track to Mr. Right? It would save us from a lot of heartbreak and drama. However, Mr. Wrong can also save us from further heartbreak and drama — if we choose to take the lessons he taught us. Here are 10 crucial lessons you learn from dating the wrong guy:
1. Value your time.
When you waste a lot of time with the wrong guy, you learn to value your time in the future and only give it to those who deserve it. Time you could’ve spent building a strong relationship and getting to know one another. It’s easier when you are young to waste more time exploring with someone you don’t see a future with but as you get older, your time becomes more important and wrong guys will not value the importance of your time.
2. Trust your gut.
More often than not, your intuition tells you if this guy is going to be serious about you or not, and sometimes you just choose to neglect it waiting for a surprise or a change of heart. You can always tell if a guy is being truthful to you and if he has the right intentions. The wrong guy teaches you how to listen to your gut.
3. No one is busy all the time.
Even though people can be very busy and probably are; they still have time to do things for the people they care about, and if they don’t, they let them know that and then reschedule. When a guy keeps telling you he is busy— he is lying. Even the busiest of guys will make time for a woman they are really into.
4. Know your boundaries.
The wrong guy teaches you what you can and cannot tolerate. What is acceptable to you and what isn’t. It’s normal to subconsciously compromise our standards when we really like someone but sometimes it breaks the relationship rather than mend it. The wrong guy helps you tap into your subconscious and identify how far you are willing to go and if you are being taken for granted.
5. The difference between circumstances and excuses.
The wrong guy helps you distinguish between someone who can’t do something because they absolutely can’t or someone who can’t do something because they don’t want to. The wrong guy comes up with excuses for all the things he could’ve easily done but chose not to. He is the perfect archetype for someone who simply doesn’t want to make an effort.
6. Words are beautiful but they are not enough.
The wrong guy can say all the right things and do all the wrong things, and sometimes you will believe everything he says and wait for it to come to life; only to realize that it just won’t happen. The wrong guy will buy himself time by saying things he doesn’t mean, which will teach you to just wait for actions instead of being hung up on lies or words blurted out on the spur of the moment.
7. What you are truly looking for.
Sometimes you think you want a certain type of guy only to realize that this type is actually not compatible with you and will not be able to give you the connection you desire. Dating the wrong guys teaches you exactly what you are looking for. You no longer date someone because they “look good on paper,” you date them because you think you two can connect on a deeper level and they respect who you really are.
8. The kind of guys you need to steer clear of.
The wrong guy teaches you exactly the type of guys you should beware of and how to avoid them. You have a better idea of where these guys hang out and how they act and you will be able to spot them before you get emotionally attached. A guy usually shows his true colors early on, you just need to know what to look for.
9. A relationship should make you happy.
Even though happiness is a broad and vague term, a relationship should bring you joy and comfort more than anything else. It definitely shouldn’t leave you sad and angry most of the time. The wrong guy teaches you that if all you do is argue and fight or if the good moments are sporadic, then it is time to walk away. This is not how a healthy relationship operates.
10. What you deserve.
The most important lesson you learn is what you deserve and how you should be treated, when to walk away from someone who is not right for you and when to let go of someone who does not meet your standards. You know your worth and you know that you want a relationship that makes you grow and a relationship that is worth your time, effort and heart.