Women have been told over and over again to play some sort of game in the dating world. The game of waiting a few hours to text back, the game of not being too available, the game of being mysterious in the beginning, the game of not showing too much interest at first or saying less than necessary. While I tried over and over again to play these games, I’ve come to realize that I suck at them and that they suck in general. Here is what I learned about playing love games.

1. They are a waste of time.

Playing games with someone you really like is a waste of time. I am not saying go tell the person you like that you can’t stop thinking about them from day one, but I am saying if you keep pretending that you are not excited about a text, or not looking forward to seeing them or talking to them, you manifest that energy into existence and you keep dragging the game on until it’s no longer fun.

2. The rules of the game keep changing.

The games change from city to city, from generation to generation, pre-tinder and post-tinder. So even if you finally got the hang of it, it will not stay that way for long and by the time you learn the new rules, even newer rules will be introduced and you will not be able to catch up. You will keep running around in circles.

3. Some people are just born with it.

Some people are just naturals at it-playing games is kind of a God-given gift. Some people just have it in them and they can pull it off and win. While some others try too hard and still lose. So if you are wondering why some people play the game better than you do; it’s because they have they already have that talent and it doesn’t go against their nature.

4. Someone always gets hurt.

Playing games is fun and exciting until someone loses or gets hurt. I don’t think we intentionally want to hurt people but this is what happens when people play with emotions. You can get over losing a video game quickly but you can’t get over your tears that quickly.

5. They are temporary.

You can’t be on top for so long, at some point your game will not be as strong, whether you will start developing real feelings or you will just get tired of wearing a mask that no longer fits you. One of those days, you will just lose interest in winning and maybe lose interest in the game altogether. The truth always comes out and it will set you free.

6. They may never lead to true love.

If you are looking for long lasting love, then you have to be true to yourself and true to your partner. If you play games, you may be going after lust or infatuation, but not the kind of love that is pure and genuine.

7. They are easily exposed.

You can play as many games as you like, but if they are all fake, you will eventually get exposed and you will then have a hard time getting away with playing them in the future.

8. They don’t solve the problem.

They still don’t let you know if the person is genuinely interested in you or in the game you are playing. They don’t answer the real question.

9. They get old.

Just like video games, you get bored of them after a while. The thrill just wanes after some time or you get hooked on a new game. Sometimes you don’t even have the time to play these games anymore. Games have an expiration date but your heart is timeless.

10. ‘Game over’ is not so bad.

What is the worst that could happen if you stop playing games? The person you like may not feel the same way about you, you will be disappointed for a little bit but you will know sooner than later and save yourself before getting attached or investing more.