10 Signs You’re Not Actually in a Relationship Even Though You Think You Are

Flickr / Eva Peris
Flickr / Eva Peris

To clarify, I’ve been in this position before, so I try to be as honest as I can when I’m not into someone, or when I really just want to be friends. This article is meant to be satyrical but true, and everyone’s situation is different so take it with a grain of salt and do what you will. It’s your own life.

1. For every text he or she sends you, you send them at least two.

But probably closer to five.

2. You read into every little action or phrase that the other person does.

And you analyze it down to microscopic elements. You do this in an obsessive way, probably every single day. You aren’t secure with where you two are or what you mean to the other person. A thought you may have had is, “Maybe if I changed this thing about myself, it would work out better”.

3. They avoid having you meet their friends or family, or really anyone they know.

Or if you somehow do end up meeting their friends, they introduce you by just your first name, in a very ambiguous way.

4. They pull away from you at random.

They go through hot and cold behavior with you, and it always seems as though it happens for no apparent reason. “Consistency” is not really in their vocabulary.

5. You and this person in question have “broken up” at least once.

But probably more than once. And it’s been because they’ve stopped seeing you, and not the other way around.

6. They will stop communicating with you out of the blue.

Or they’ll first tell you how crazy you are, that you’re needy or emotionally messed up in some way, then they will stop communicating with you.

7. They are fond of saying things like, “I’m not comfortable with labels.”

Or “I’m not ready for a relationship.” Or they have flat out told you they don’t want a relationship, and you hang out with them anyway, because you enjoy their company.

8. The main time they prefer to call or text you is when it’s late at night, booty call style.

The only time you go out on dates is when it ends with sex.

9. They’re sweet to you when it suits them.

Usually it’s when they’re feeling lonely. They only reveal a little about themselves, but hold the rest back. They’re hard to get to know, and maybe obsessed with their ex.

10. You automatically think there’s no way this article could possibly apply to you.

What’s the moral of the story here? Talk about what you want with the person in question and see if they are on the same page as you. If not, what’s the benefit to having them in your life versus the mental stress and the cost? Value who you are as a person and make sure the person you devote your time and energy to will do the same for you. Thought Catalog Logo Mark

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About the author

Radha Kistler

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