Confessions On Life And Love From An INTJ


One of my favourite discoveries of last year was the Myers-Briggs personality test. I had recently joined a new company that was big on personality testing. Their first report was startlingly accurate and I became more curious about the whole thing. I eventually stumbled upon the Myers-Briggs test and of course took it. Reading over that report was even more interesting – I felt like finally someone understood what made me tick and was surprised there were others (although not many, my type makes up 2% of the general population) like me.

Even knowing my own shortcomings and issues, I don’t think I’d change who I am. So with that said, here are some confessions of what it’s like to be an INTJ – for better and for worse.

1. While I can do social situations, anything with more than a couple of people feels really awkward for me. If humans were made on an assembly line, I’d suspect that they forgot to put the “group social interaction” chip in me.

2. I’m extremely impatient. Whether it’s people doing things slowly because they don’t get it, they can’t keep up, or they’re just being slow for the sake of it, it irritates me to no end.

3. I never really feel like I fit in anywhere.

4. I once left a work function early, because I was more excited about starting work on a project I’d just thought of than getting drunk with everyone else.

5. I sometimes wish I’d gone into science or tech. Every INTJ profile I read says we are so good at it, I feel as though I missed the boat on a truckload of money by being more fascinated in psychology, philosophy and the nature of things. Although I suspect it’s more satisfying.

6. I’m both angry and disappointed that I live in a world where the Kardashians have more money and influence than someone like Alain de Botton.

7. While I feel uncomfortable in group situations, I form fast and very deep friendships with individual people who are intellectually curious and passionate.

8. I feel extremely energised after spending 4 hours discussing ideas and hypotheses with my best friends.

9. I love time alone to just sit and think.

10. I never feel truly satisfied unless I’m doing work that is difficult.

11. I want to put a system in place for just about everything.

12. I found military service difficult, because assuming I’m an idiot and need to be treated as such is the surest way to piss me off.

13. I can’t stand opinions based on emotions, when logic and reason suggest the opposite.

14. I have an almost insatiable thirst for more knowledge. It feels like I have an addiction to reading.

15. I find people who hold intense ideologies, such as patriotism, religion etc utterly baffling.

16. I despise it when people back down from a debate with “you just have to be right” or “I don’t want to argue”. I lose respect for people who can’t put their beliefs up to scrutiny and retreat back to comfort of believing a position they know to be false.

17. I find dealing with my 2 year old daughter’s temper tantrums and obstinance incredibly difficult, because the things I am best at – i.e. logic and reasoning, don’t work.

18. My dream job would be as a consultant, where people brought me in to analyse their operation and point out inefficiencies, to create systems that would fix their problems.

19. In a group situation, people will often say “you’re being very quiet”. I just find more satisfaction in listening than talking. Either that or I’m bored out of my brain by conversation on pointless subjects.

I hope that gave you an interesting insight into the mind of an INTJ. TC mark


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