I’m Slowly Learning The Only Thing I Can Change Is Myself

how to decide to be happy and accept what you can't change

I’m slowly learning that I can’t really change other people. You can’t convince someone to see your point of view if they don’t want to see it. You can’t save them or fix them or expect them to do things your way if they don’t want to change. You can’t take back something somebody else said or did. You can’t make them eat their own words and erase their actions. People will be who they are until they change on their own time by themselves. I’m slowly learning to stop trying to change other people and change myself instead.

I’m slowly learning to accept circumstances that I can’t change. Sometimes, life spirals out of control, things don’t make sense, and the future seems uncertain. Sometimes, people surprise you and disappoint you. Sometimes, you mess up and let others down. I’m slowly learning that both desirable and undesirable things will happen. I’m learning to be okay when the sun is shining, when the storms clouds gather, when the skies pour, and when the water freezes over. I’m learning to shrug my shoulders and roll with the punches. I’m learning to say, so what?

I’m slowly learning to love myself more. I’m learning that external forces can’t really give me what I’m missing. I’m managing my expectations and realizing that I am complete within myself. I have the strength and resources to get everything that I truly need. A lover can’t connect you with your deepest self, a place can’t give you a sense of belonging, society can’t give you approval, a career can’t give you an identity, and a friend can’t make you feel worthy. You’re the only one who can make sense of the missing spaces and fill the emptiness with meaning.

I’m slowly learning to conserve my personal energy. It is a waste of time and energy to try to control things around you. If you keep fighting to win, eventually you’re going to exhaust yourself and burn out. You’re going to get lost in the maze of rights and wrongs and the grey areas in between until you forget where you came from. It’s better to choose peace and love over power struggles and ego battles. I’m slowly learning to take care of myself and look after my health and happiness. I’m choosing to conserve my valuable resource of personal energy and redirect it towards personal growth and development.

I’m slowly learning that the only thing I can actually change is myself. I’m learning to be adaptable and flexible. I’m learning to discard the parts of myself that don’t fit and shed the layers that no longer belong. I’m learning to let things go and walk away from things that are hurting me. I’m learning to pick my battles while being mindful of the bigger picture at hand. I’m learning to bend rather than break. I may not be able to change other people or situations, but I can choose to increase my awareness, expand my consciousness, and consistently work towards the person that I am finally becoming. Thought Catalog Logo Mark

About the author

Nikita Mor

Lover of personal growth and poetry

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