7 Signs He’s Only Staying In The Relationship Because He’s Too Scared To Leave

We don’t intend to hurt the ones we love by leaving, but staying out of fear sometimes creates just as much pain.

Brandon Woelfel

1. He REALLY enjoys the time he doesn’t spend with you.

It’s healthy to have your own lives in your relationship. Just because you’re together doesn’t mean you actually have to do everything together. A little space is necessary, but when you feel like he enjoys the time he spends away from you more than the time he spends with you, that’s not a good feeling. You should be happy to be back together, you should want to return home to them. If after your two week work trip he doesn’t seem happy to see you, it’s most likely because he’s not truly happy to see you.

2. He becomes indifferent to basically everything.

He just doesn’t care. He doesn’t care what restaurant you go to for date night. He doesn’t care whether or not you come with him to his parents house for dinner. When he cares about your relationship he cares enough to have an opinion about the things going on within your relationship, like what you do together and when and where and why. His indifference is his way of remaining in a relationship that he’s simply okay with because he’s too scared his leaving will hurt you.

3. He doesn’t notice the little things you do for him.

Mainly because he’s unhappy. His unhappiness is blinding him to the little things he used to appreciate in your relationship. He used to love the little notes you left for him around his apartment. He used to love when you’d dress up for a night out in the city and wear those heels and dress that you can’t wait to take off. He used to love all of these things, and now he barely even notices when you do them.

4. When you disagree he gives in easily.

He doesn’t even put up a fight anymore. The reason he doesn’t have the energy to argue with you is because he doesn’t know if he still wants to be with you. He avoids arguments to the best of his ability because he wants things to be easy, but healthy relationships aren’t always easy, and he knows that.

5. He uses distractions as distance.

When he plays video games the ENTIRE night, he might be doing that to avoid talking to you. I’m sure if he’s playing the game so often, then yes he most likely enjoys it, but when killing trolls is more exciting than spending face-to-face (or skin-to-skin) time communicating with you, then he’s basically saying he enjoys his video games more than your relationship. When he uses distractions that make him noticeably distant, something is off.

6. You feel like he’s not attracted to you anymore.

When he stops doing the physical things that let you know he wants you, it might be because he’s unhappy in your relationship. It’s normal to be a little less physical when you’ve been together forever, but you can still feel attraction without getting physical. Even just the way they look at you can make you feel attraction. If you don’t feel it, it’s because it’s not there, and that most likely means they’re only in this relationship because they’re too scared to leave.

7. The nice things he does for you feel insincere.

Sincerity and authenticity is sometimes easier to pick up on when it’s missing. When he tells you you look nice while looking at his phone, that’s not sincerity. When he tells you he loves you while pulling away, that’s not sincerity either. Trust your gut, if you feel like he’s only being nice to appease you then he probably is. Don’t be with someone who just wants to pass the time along, be with someone who ignites your life with passion, someone who makes you wake up excited every morning, someone whose happiness is elevated by your happiness. If he’s staying in this relationship because he’s too scared to leave, then maybe you’re the one who has to be fearless, maybe you’re the one who should consider leaving. Thought Catalog Logo Mark

About the author

Nicole Tarkoff

Writer based in the Philadelphia area. Person who really loves her dog and watching cooking shows. Check out my writing on Thought Catalog and follow me on Facebook! Connect with me and submit your work on Collective World.

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