For All The Girls Who Don’t Dream Of Getting Married


It’s one thing to find love, and it’s another to find love that lasts a lifetime, but maybe it’s not marriage that makes love last. Maybe it’s people, and life, and the balance between love that we’re willing to give versus the love that we think we deserve.

Maybe you’re the girl who hopes to find eternal love, but doesn’t rearrange her life to insure that it happens. You let life happen to you, and you hope love will happen with it. There’s nothing wrong in letting love find you, as long as you’re open to it when it does. You don’t resist love, and you don’t close yourself off to it, but you also don’t endlessly search for it in places it may or may not exist.

Maybe you’re the girl who feels that love is more important than walking down an aisle.
You don’t need a diamond to symbolize your eternal devotion, you don’t need a white dress, a four-layer cake or a three-course menu. You want someone to share your life with, but you don’t need a wedding or a marriage to do so.

Maybe you’re the girl who has been broken one too many times and thinks she’ll never find a love that lasts forever. You try to stay hopeful and push negativity to a place where others can’t see it, but you know it’s there. Who could think about marriage and a wedding when they can’t find a person who loves them continuously? But when you think like that, you’re convincing yourself that love is something you don’t deserve, and if you believe that you’ll accept love from others who treat you like it’s true.

Maybe you’re the girl who has been witness to numerous marriages that have worked. Marriages that have not only demonstrated unconditional love, but dysfuntional, messy, authentically, real love. Love that doesn’t look perfect, or tries to be perfect, but love that just is. And even though you’ve seen marriages that work, you don’t necessarily see that for yourself. And maybe you don’t know why, and you shouldn’t have to, but that’s just how you feel.

Maybe you’re the girl who has been witness to numerous marriages that have failed.
And maybe those failures have created scars in you so deep that you’ve banished the idea of any form of union ever existing in your life. Maybe you think marriage is the death of all relationships, and you’re not trying to be the epitome of pessimism, but you also don’t feel the need to apologize for wanting what you want, and not wanting what you don’t.

Maybe you’re the girl who hasn’t met someone you can picture spending the rest of your life with. And maybe when that moment happens you’ll realize all you needed was time. Maybe you’re unsure of how you’ll know love when it finds you, whether someone is right for you or wrong, and maybe you’re tired of hearing, “You just know.” Maybe you met someone who you thought could be forever, but instead was just for now, and maybe you’re scared to experience that disappointment again.

Maybe you’re the girl who doesn’t dream of getting married
, the girl who doesn’t think of marriage as something to aspire to, but simply something that may or may not happen. Thought Catalog Logo Mark

Writer based in the Philadelphia area. Person who really loves her dog and watching cooking shows. Check out my writing on Thought Catalog and follow me on Facebook! Connect with me and submit your work on Collective World.

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