10 Women Share The Closest They’ve Ever Come To Cheating And What Made Them Not Go Through With It

Twenty20 / MagdalenaRikanovic
Twenty20 / MagdalenaRikanovic

1. “I’m with my boyfriend because I don’t want to be with anyone else, period. Sure I’ve been hit on by very attractive men that I’m sure I would have a fantastic time screwing, but I don’t look forward to waking up to those men each morning, they won’t ever be able to make me feel the way my boyfriend does, and that’s why I don’t cheat.” —Lauren, 25

beetlejuice

2. “It was my ex. We had been done for a good two years, but we dated from freshman year of high school to senior year of college, so we went through a good deal of change together, young love at its finest. One night he invited me over to help organize his closet (weird I know, but I’m a neat freak so I’m good at that stuff), and we were drinking wine, and hashing out high school memories, and he sat down on the closet floor and told me to come sit by him. I did.

He was just looking at me and smiling and he grabbed my hand and told me he missed me. When he said that the first thing that popped into my head was my current boyfriend, and how hurt he’d be if I was willing to risk one night for our entire relationship, and that was when I realized how much he meant to me, and how much my ex didn’t.” —Caylee, 28

beetlejuice

3. “There’s temptation to cheat everywhere, basically every moment you’re out and not with your significant other there’s an opportunity, but why would you agree to commit to one person if you’re not fully willing to honor that commitment? Basically that’s what I remind myself if I ever even think about cheating. I wouldn’t be in a relationship with my partner if I wanted to be with other people.” —Annabelle, 26

beetlejuice

4. “I went to a business conference with work, and there were tens of thousands of people who were all my age, all in my profession, and all had a significant amount of ambition for the same things I did. Obviously there’s hotel rooms, and places where my boyfriend never would’ve known had I slept with one of these tens of thousands of people, nor would the news ever get back to him because he would have no idea who any of these people were.

I got drinks with one of them, just me and him, and I definitely did not tell him I had a boyfriend while doing so. I felt terrible the entire time, every sip of my drink I just kept thinking what the hell am I doing? And every minute that went by when he’d hit on me, I kept wondering why I wasn’t stopping him. I basically let it get as far as it could before I told him that I was going back to my room alone. I think I just wanted to flirt with that line, literally and figuratively. I didn’t cheat, but I just wanted to see how close I could come to it without actually doing it.” —Kellianne, 27

beetlejuice

5. “I was so drunk, and we had been in a fight the night before. I hadn’t spoken to him all day, and I went out with my girlfriends (without him) and they all knew I was terribly furious with him, which is most likely why they didn’t stop me from flirting with basically every man who glanced my way at the bar. One of these men bought me a drink, did the whole flirty small talk routine, gave me a couple of slight touches by my waist, and before I know it he was leaning in for a kiss. I was really drunk at this point, but not drunk enough to realize I was majorly fucking up, no matter how mad I was at my boyfriend. I awkwardly turned my head to give him my cheek and that’s all he got. After we left the bar I of course drunkenly called my boyfriend to tell him what happened, he told me to come home and we had glorious makeup sex.” —Hannah, 25

beetlejuice

6. “We’re all tempted of course, but if you actually go through with it clearly there is something missing from your current relationship, and maybe that’s something cheaters need to think about. You wouldn’t be seeking affection from someone else if you truly wanted to be with your significant other. When I wanted to sleep with someone else I told my boyfriend, not to make him jealous or hurt him, but because I felt like I had to be honest and let him know what was going on, and I think that’s what anyone should do. If you’re thinking about cheating just talk about it, and figure out what you have to do so you don’t, whether that’s breaking up or not.” —Bridget, 25

beetlejuice

7. “I’ve been cheated on before. It sucks. It’s basically the worst feeling you could ever have in a relationship, and even if you forgive the person, you carry their mistake with you every time you’re together, and no matter how hard you try to trust them there’s still a small part of you that doesn’t. The person I’m with now, if for some reason I ever find myself tempted to cheat, I remind myself of how bad it hurt when my last boyfriend did it to me.” —Shannon, 24

beetlejuice

8. “I have cheated before, and I tried to hide it, and failed terribly, and it destroyed my relationship. With my current boyfriend I’ve been presented the same opportunities to cheat, and I just think about how it’s not worth it. He means more to me than one night with some stranger. If you cheat it says a lot about how much you feel your relationship is worth.” —Mackenzie, 26

beetlejuice

9. “Three things. Bachelorette party. Vegas. Alcohol. And that is the closest I’ve ever come to cheating.” —Trish, 27

beetlejuice

10. “Cheating is all sort of relative to each couple anyway. Some people think kissing is cheating, some people think only sex is cheating, it varies, but I don’t think it makes it any more redeeming when you come close to cheating, but don’t go through with it. You still came close, and that says a lot. I wouldn’t want to be with someone who whispers in a girl’s ear that she’s beautiful, kisses her hand, and then comes home to me. Sure you only kissed her hand, and whispered in her ear, but am I supposed to give you a pat on the back for not ripping her clothes off and fucking her? Absolutely not.” —Mia, 26 TC mark

Nicole Tarkoff

Writer based in the Philadelphia area. Person who really loves her dog and watching cooking shows. Check out my writing on Thought Catalog and follow me on Facebook! Connect with me and submit your work on Collective World.

This is me letting you go

If there’s one thing we all need to stop doing, it’s waiting around for someone else to show up and change our lives. Just be the person you’ve been waiting for.

At the end of the day, you have two choices in love – one is to accept someone just as they are and the other is to walk away.

We owe it to ourselves to live the greatest life that we’re capable of living, even if that means that we have to be alone for a very long time.

“Everyone could use a book like this at some point in their life.” – Heather

Let go now

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