10 Women Reveal Why They Friendzoned Men Who Wanted More Than Friendship

1. “You know those butterflies you get when you see a text pop up on your phone from that guy you can’t stop thinking about? Well, I didn’t get those (the butterflies, not the texts), and that’s kind of how I knew.” —Carrie, 24

2. “I kept trying to imagine having sex with him, and I just couldn’t. I think that’s a key sign he’s just a friend.” —Francesca, 22

3. “He reminded me of my brother. And I don’t mean in a way that, “Oh he’s like a brother to me!” I mean in a way like he literally had the same personality as my brother, and it freaked me out. There’s nothing romantic about your brother.” —Annie, 26

4. “One night he totally just went for it, and we kissed, and I give him so much credit for that, but at the same time, I just didn’t feel it. I think the kiss says a lot, especially if you’re already questioning whether or not you’re into them.” —Rachel, 28

5. “He was so sweet, and we got along so well, and I seriously WISHED that I could want him to be more than just a friend, but I didn’t feel with him what I felt in my past relationships. Maybe that means he’s the right guy because obviously the other relationships didn’t workout so well, but for now, the connection just isn’t fully there. Part of me thinks it’s going to be like one of those rom coms where in ten years he’s married and happy, and I’m alone wishing I would’ve given him a chance. I guess we’ll see.” —Lina, 23

6. “He would never make a move! He used to tell all my friends that he was basically in love with me, and if it weren’t for them passing that message along, I would have no idea how he felt. And then once I knew I not only wondered why he wasn’t doing anything about his feelings, but I was sort of turned off by the fact that he didn’t. I want a guy who wants me, and I didn’t feel like he wanted me, regardless of what he told my friends.” —Hayley, 22

7. “He was a lot younger than me. I was a year out of college when he was just starting it. The timing is just not on our side. It’s a shame because I’m actually very attracted to him, but he was attending frat parties and day drinking on Wednesdays, while I’m working a 9 to 5 and can’t put up with drunken texts and voicemails. Maybe when he’s older we can be more, but for now he’s just a friend.” —Victoria, 25

8. “We were friends while he was dating another girl, and I saw the way he treated her in the relationship, and it just wasn’t the way I’d want to be treated as a girlfriend. When they broke up he started pursuing me (probably just because he was lonely), but I kept thinking back to how that girl was treated, and I didn’t want to be her.” —Dana, 29

9. “He was just too accommodating. I don’t want a guy who is a complete asshole to me, because I think some men have this idea in their head that if they’re a jerk it will make a woman want them, but he would never EVER openly disagree with me even if he was totally against everything I was saying or doing. If you want to date me, you don’t have to kiss the ground I walk on. I understand being nice and respectful, but I wanted him to think for himself, to have his own personality, his own opinions, not to just nod along with me.” —Caroline, 24

10. “For some reason when I thought about being with him I felt like I was settling, and I don’t want to settle. I want to be with someone I 100 percent know I want to be with, anything less is just not enough for me. Maybe that’s expecting or asking for too much, but I don’t think I need to lower my standards just to be in a relationship.” —Melissa, 27