Ned Hepburn
Ned Hepburn is a writer, traveler, and bon vivant currently residing in New York City. He has written and worked ...
Latest Posts
Messages Left On Carly Rae Jepsen’s Voicemail
A Guy From 2003 Wakes Up Out Of A Coma
Can I use someone’s Motorola Razr? I need to leave a voicemail for my girlfriend on her landline.
What Women Want (Bugs Bunny Vs. Lennie)
I remember one time she came over and I had cleaned my room, lit a candle, and put on a particularly cheesy album to play to soundtrack my romance that night. And she laughed at it.
The Ballad Of Coffee Shops, Copy Editing, And Ignorant Paul
That hat cost $80. That man had $80 to spend on a hat. That man had a job and a lifestyle which afforded him the cost of a week’s worth of Paul’s groceries for something the man could wear on his head.
What Your Favorite HBO Show Says About You
You love sex but hate genitalia. It takes you 11 hours to tell a story that would take anybody else 10 minutes.
Broing Out With Hitler
Sometimes you orchestrate your will over others and take control of an entire country. And I mean, who HASN’T done that, am I right?
How To Occupy Wall Street
Sitting Across From Bret Easton Ellis
You wonder about that NYU freshman kid in the purple sweatshirt and what his story is and whether, to be honest, he’d be more interesting than Bret Easton Ellis because Bret Easton Ellis has kind of just, well, given up, it seemed, which was a horrible thing to think about a guy that was sitting right in front of you…
Winnie The Pooh And The Shotgun
It had been during that 11-hour car ride, Pooh thought to himself as he spied the river off in the distance, when he realized he had to kill Piglet.
