Dear Best Friend, You Don’t Have To Fight Your Battles Alone

Twenty20 / @karly.valencia

I want you to know that I see you.

I see you for who you are and what you have been through. I see you for all the pieces that belong to your soul no matter how jumbled and broken they may be. I also know that you are a beautiful and brilliant person. So loving, kind and charismatic.

You want to know one of the best things I see in you? You will put aside everything your feeling when you see that one person you know you can trust falling apart and help them tackle their own personal battle.

A true friendship is not a one-way street and now I am going to do the same for you.

What do you do when those broken pieces of yourself get lost in the wind of the storm that shattered you? Leaving you with forgotten memories of who you were and leaving those jagged thoughts not fitting right?

I can see the struggle in finding the answers because I, myself, have been there. I am there. With every waking moment feeling lost, confused, and alone. Believing that no one out there understands the pain in my heart therefore the best option is to stay to myself. Because, at least when it’s only me, the judgmental world is limited to only one.

So, you feel the need to fight like hell just to survive. All while forcing yourself together and ending up with nothing but a jumbled, messed up picture of whom you use to be. You see nothing but a shriveled-up stranger staring back at you in the mirror.

You find it hard to recognize yourself in the mirror. The only thing you see is the flashbacks of how you got your scars. You are haunted by those memories that broke you. Every time you blink you can still feel the pain as if it just happened for the first time. You’re re-living that nightmare every time you close your eyes. You don’t know how to run the other way.

How can you when your mirror image reflects every failed attempt of survival?

Those missing pieces are so visible you can see right through them. As the days go by, you found substitute fixes to fill those cracks but, more often than not, you feel yourself breaking all over again. You are so lost and confused about where you are and how you even made it this far.

You keep asking the same question over and over, “How do you become happy with yourself?” You want to be that same person you were before the storm hit. Before you were swept off your feet and shattered into a million tiny pieces.

Maybe the answer is simple, or at least it should be.

Or maybe the answer is so far-fetched that it seems impossible for you to grasp. The fact that nobody really knows the true answer is what makes everything seem impossible. Every person is unique which causes us to handle a situation very differently.

You have to keep trying. Don’t ever give up. Don’t ever give in. Never let your darkest thoughts control your actions.

Use your thoughts as an encouragement to keep going forward and try for something different when the first path leads you astray.

Or, what if, instead of putting yourself back together piece by piece, you were to build a new you?

One that is better and stronger. One that makes the old you seem like it as all just a figment of your imagination. What if one day you woke up and those cracks were filled with something that no one could ever break?

The road ahead will be difficult. You will be faced with many challenges. How you face them will depend on the person you want to be after everything is said and done.

The old you may have not stood a chance at surviving the eye of this storm, but the new you will. The new you has something that the old one didn’t. A friend who is traveling down that same broken road.

Imagine how it would feel to wake up in the morning knowing you can take on whatever this world throws at you. Taking what you went through and using it as a blueprint for your new and improved strength. Proving that this person has always been inside of you.

Right now, that doesn’t even begin to feel like a possible reality for you to chase. I have been on this run for so many years. But my morals prevented me from taking any such thoughts into action. The same way those morals have done for you.

I refuse to let you be alone in this. I refuse to give up on you, and I’ll be damned if I let what someone else did draw the ending to these chapters we have been forced into.

It’s time we take over that pen and start writing our own future. I’ll be damned to see you refuse to write your own path. This is your life. You control what is to become of yourself. If I must, I will force the pen into your hand myself.

I’ll do it with a smile on my face and pride in my heart. Honored to say that my friend right here is the strongest person I know. You have made it this far. The pen is in your power. I will not be the one to write your next chapter. I can only hope to be a part of it as you will apart of mine.

I think it’s time we finally take the reins back. You push me and I will push you. I’m in it for the long haul. Day or night I will be there. You have now been declared my person.

This friendship we have started will be the chance to free ourselves from the darkest pit hell we have fallen into.

It has been way too long since I have had someone to call my best friend. I sure as hell will get it right this time. There is no turning back now, if you fail; then I fail.
You will no longer fight this battle alone. Thought Catalog Logo Mark


About the author

Michelle Ryan

Been through a lot to learn a lot.

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