1. You like sexy lingerie, but you understand that your vagina needs to breathe on occasion so you own several pairs of cotton underwear in addition to lace or satin panties.
2. You’re not opposed to a bikini wax—prior to a beach vacation, or whenever you feel like going bare—but you’re not too embarrassed to grow out your pubic hair.
3. You can watch porn without freaking out that your labia minora and majora aren’t the “right” size because you know there is no “right” size for vaginal lips.
4. You respect and appreciate the reality that all vaginas are different rather than being terrified that yours is.
5. You’ve scoured a few “show your vagina” blogs, and maybe even posted an anonymous photo to one.
6. You keep track of your menstrual cycle and you don’t apologize if and when you’re acting a little moody before your period starts. PMS is part of the female package and if a man doesn’t like it, he’s free to try and find himself a grownup woman who doesn’t menstruate.
7. You masturbate regularly.
8. You gave yourself your very first orgasm—and you’re proud of it.
9. It amuses you to do kegel exercises during meetings with your boss, important lectures, movies, family dinners, etc.
10. You’ve contemplated purchasing a merkin (a vagina wig, essentially), because they’re hilarious.
11. You’re not embarrassed to “queef” or “vart” during sex because vaginal farting is just as funny as regularly farting, only it doesn’t smell.
12. You have a secret name for your vagina—one that evokes power and beauty in your mind for whatever reason, like Roxy, or Cassandra—so you can talk about it with your boyfriend on the sly in public.
13. You think the term “designer vagina” is pretty offensive. WTF does a “designer penis” look like?
14. However, you’re totally okay with the terms “pussy” and “cunt” when used in the right context. After all, “dick” and “prick” have similar connotations.
15. Speaking of penises, you cannot for the life of you imagine what’s it’s like to have external genitalia.
16. But you enjoy thinking about just how vulnerable the male sex is as a result of their biological configuration.
17. You wonder why so many parents teach their little girls to refer to the vagina as a “poony,” “twinkle twat,” or “tee-tee” since no other female body part gets the same treatment.
18. If you ever have a daughter, you won’t assign her genitalia a silly name because you don’t want her to attach any shame to it. Vagina and vulva will do just fine.
19. When the guy you’re dating expresses confusion over the fact that you have a separate hole for peeing, unlike him, you’ll happily pull down your pants and point out the difference between the hole for sexual intercourse and/or birthing babies, and the one for urinating. At the very least, you’ll draw a diagram. (A surprising number of guys don’t know about the female pee hole.)
20. You’re not afraid to touch yourself down there while your partner’s watching—either to turn him on, or to help him figure out exactly how things work.
21. You can address an itching sensation without Googling yourself down a rabbithole of possible symptoms.
22. You realize that you’re unqualified to diagnose yourself, so you will see a professional if and when it seems necessary.
23. The first time you visited a gynecologist as a teenager seemed like an important life milestone.
24. So did the first day you noticed a little discharge in your underwear as a preadolescent, even if you had to ask your mom whether it meant that you were sick.
25. On the other hand, the experience of losing your virginity wasn’t necessarily memorable—and you’re okay with that. Everything takes practice.