How To Go From Friend To Lover In 3 Easy Steps


I’m not going to start off this blog with a fluffy intro that talks about the pain you feel from having a woman in your life that you DESPERATELY want more from but just can’t seem to make it happen.


Because I know that you don’t need a reminder of what it is you are experiencing. You need solutions, action and steps to make change. Am I right?

Listen, I’ve been in the friend zone. So I know it freaking SUCKS!!!!

You sit.

You wait.

You “perform” and show the best version of yourself hoping, that just maybe they’ll notice and think, “Wow. You are so awesome. I don’t know why I didn’t see it before. I want to be with you!!! I’m so stupid for not thinking of you in that way.”

Sadly, that never happens.

Why? Because change will never happen IF you are waiting on her to give you the GREEN LIGHT to go after what you want.

The thing is, that with women, we need you to make us feel something about you in order for us to even consider as more than a friend.

AND you can’t make us feel something if you are always holding back, biting your tongue and trying to please us with your actions i.e. gifts, being there for us etc…. If you want more from this women you have to start BEING more and going after more.

The only one keeping you in the friend zone is you my friend.

I learned that the hard way but luckily I learned how to get out of the friend zone and how to make sure I never put myself there in the first place.

I’m going to break down for you How To Go From Friend To Lover In 3 Easy Steps.


No more sitting back and waiting for her to tell you that you are allowed to flirt with her. FLIRT, tease, challenge. Say things that she may not agree with or that you feel strongly about with fear that she may or may not like you.

Get her to feel something about you and take notice of you. Right now you are simply the nice little puppy that’s by her side. Be the bull dog that pulls her around a bit but also gives her awesome attention when he decides.


That means you are full permission to use words like DATE when referring to what you are doing with her. You can tell her she’s sexy. You can look her in the eyes, smirk and then brush her hair away from her face. OR you can be really bold and tell her exactly what you want from her “I think you are awesome, smart, sexy and unlike any other woman I’ve met before. There is something about you that draws me to you. I know we are friends but I’d like to explore more with you.” Say that coupled with the change in behavior, touching, direct voice tonality and she will get what it is you want.

STEP 3: This the most important one – DON’T SETTLE FOR LESS:

If you are hanging out with a woman BUT what you really want is something more then don’t settle for less. If you have tried #1 and #2 and her behavior is not following your to a more flirty level OR if she starts to get uncomfortable and shy away, then she is not into you and doesn’t want what you want. Which means it’s time to alter your “friendship” and start to explore other women that could give you what you want.

NOTE: If you really do enjoy your friendship and are okay with just being friends with no hopes of still becoming more, then you can maintain the friendship but don’t give it as much attention as you were in the past.

And there you have it!

Now all you have to do is start doing what I’ve said and you’ll be surprised at how quickly things change. Thought Catalog Logo Mark

Best Selling Author, Host of the Ask Women Podcast and Ultimate ‘Wing Girl’ to hundreds of thousands of men around the world.

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