7 Undeniable Strengths You Gain In Walking Away From A Narcissistic Relationship

girl sitting on a park bench, signs of strength, leaving a narcissistic relationship
Allegra Messina

1. Your sense of peace.

When you walk away from a narcissistic relationship your biggest strength becomes your ability to seek peace, be filled with peace, and create peace in your life and the lives of those around you. No longer are you burdened or held back by your relationship. No longer are you held captive to someone’s negative beliefs about who you are. No longer are you emptied, day after day, by someone who devalues you under the guise of ‘care’ or ‘love.’

When you walk away, you give yourself the strength to find harmony in the world. To appreciate what’s around you, to slow down, and to find your solace in the beautiful, chaotic mess.

2. Your will to move forward.

Leaving a narcissistic relationship gives you the strength to always look and step forward. This process isn’t easy. There will be days when you feel heavy, days when you give up, and days when you just settle because sometimes it feels easier to be passive than to fight. But eventually, you will escape the tight grasp. Eventually, you will realize someone’s opinion of you is not who you are. Eventually, you will crawl, stand, walk, run forward until you are free. And in that moment, you will gain the strength of perseverance and a future-focused mindset.

3. The ability to let go.

Who someone says or believes you are is not who you are. You don’t have to carry the badge, the label pressed to your chest. You don’t have to be shaped by someone who says they ‘love you’ while breaking you down, piece by piece.

When you walk away from a narcissistic relationship, you gain the strength of letting go. You realize that you cannot change someone’s perspective, someone’s opinion, or even their actions and treatment of you. What you can change, however, is where you go next. And in leaving, you gain the power of letting go, letting God, and starting new.

4. The wisdom of a survivor.

You are a survivor. You have broken the chains around you. You have lifted yourself and risen above what has held you back for so long. And when you walk away, you gain the wisdom of a survivor. You now know your value and worth, and you will not allow anyone to convince you otherwise.

5. The motivation to rebuild.

Leaving means you are motivated to start new. Yes, you are broken and bruised and unsure of your next step. Yes, you are hurting and confused and wondering how someone who says he/she ‘loves you’ could treat you the way you do. But in all of the mess of feelings in your heart, you know, deep down, that you are ready and willing to rebuild your life. You want nothing more than to pick up the pieces, to soften your heart, and to stand with confidence. And that starting over, that healing—begins right now.

6. The space in your heart for self-love.

Walking away from a narcissistic relationship means you are choosing self-love. You are choosing your self-worth over the unhealthy connection you’ve been entangled in. You are deciding that you value yourself enough to leave what isn’t right for you, and is only bringing you down. And in doing this, you make room in your heart for a big, bold, beautiful love of yourself.

7. Hope.

Leaving means gaining hope. And separating yourself from a narcissistic abuser gives you a second chance at life. Despite all the pain that he/she caused and despite how weak you feel, in taking that first step, you are giving yourself hope. And when you walk away, the strength you gain is that hope—for tomorrow, for the future, for your next love, for yourself. Thought Catalog Logo Mark


About the author

Marisa Donnelly

Marisa is a writer, poet, & editor. She is the author of Somewhere On A Highway, a poetry collection on self-discovery, growth, love, loss and the challenges of becoming.

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