You Don’t Have To Be Any Less Of Yourself For Anyone

Aidan Meyer
Aidan Meyer

The world loves to tell us when we’re too much. Too loud. Too big. Too loving. Too bold. Too strong. Too lenient. Too quiet. Too demanding. Too emotional. Too much.

We’re chided. We’re judged. We’re branded with labels that begin to define us by who we inherently are, by how we naturally act. And without us even realizing, we start to change little pieces of ourselves. We start to see the way we are in a negative light. We start becoming a little less.

But I want you to know that you don’t have to be any less of yourself, not for anyone.

See, people who love you will love you for who you are. They won’t ask you to change your emotional side or the way you react to situations. They won’t demand that you calm down or quit ‘overreacting’ or request that you act a certain way when you’re around them.

The people who love you will support the ways you laugh a little too loudly or speak your mind, maybe even a little more than you should. They will stand behind you when you fight for what you believe in, or when you make a decision – even one that they might not have made.

The people who love you—who really love you—will not ask you to be a little less of yourself just to be with them.

Sure, the ones who care about us are always there to encourage us, to support us, to help make us better and show us places that we could work on. But there’s a difference between advice and alteration. There’s a difference between someone suggesting and someone saying you should be different. There’s a difference between a person who loves you showing you how you could become a better version of yourself, and them standing there in a place of judgement, demanding that you to be someone you’re not.

You don’t have to be ashamed of the way you were raised, of how your heart beats, of who you’ve been since you were little. You don’t have to adapt to rules set by people who might not have your best interests at heart. You don’t have to spend your life wishing you were different, a little less bold and a little less bright.

Listen: Who you are is someone to be proud of.

Sure, you may not be perfect. You might be a little too much sometimes. But we are all going to be a little too much. And it’s far better to be ‘a lot to handle’ than something easily thrown to the side.

So stop feeling sorry about who you are. Stop questioning whether you should do something, just because you’re scared of what someone might think or say. Stop doubting yourself. Stop wondering if you’re a little too much.

Stop trying to be less.

You are wonderful the way you are—even when you’re a lot, even when you’re a mess, even when you’re just the way you’ve always been. Who you are is perfect for the right person.

And until you find him or her, live unapologetically. Thought Catalog Logo Mark

Marisa is a writer, poet, & editor. She is the author of Somewhere On A Highway, a poetry collection on self-discovery, growth, love, loss and the challenges of becoming.

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