11 Ways To Tell If He’s Actually The Nice Guy He Appears To Be

1. He’s true to his word.

When he says he’ll be there at 7:30, he’s there at 7:30, not texting you at 7:25 to say he’s out with the guys and running late, or worse, texting you at 7:45 to say he’s on his way (aka just left the house).

2. He remembers little things you say.

Maybe you told him off-hand about how much you hate ketchup, so when you’re at In-N-Out he can make your order without even asking. Or maybe you said you like iced chai lattes, so he brings you one to work in the morning. It’s the little things that shows he’s genuinely interested and paying attention to what you say that make him a truly nice guy.

3. He shows genuine interest in your family and friends.

If he’s going to be a part of your life, that means all that comes with it—crazy extended family, over-protective friends, and crazy younger brothers. If he asks you about your family or BFFs, like how they’re doing, when you’ve last talked to them, or if you’ve mentioned him to them, he’s a genuinely good dude with intentions to stay in your life for a while.

4. He treats everyone he meets with respect.

He’s the type of guy that opens doors for people, who smiles at strangers, and who engages in conversation with everyone from the waiter to the lady handing out the tickets at the movie theatre. He is not just nice to you, but to random people, which shows that he’s not putting on an act—he’s real.

5. He follows through on his promises.

If he said he’d take you out on a date next Friday, he’ll be true to his word. He won’t cancel last minute with obligatory bros night at the bar or random sh*t he supposedly ‘forgot.’ In fact, he’ll not only remember, but he’ll remind you, just because you’re that important to him.

6. He’s comfortable letting you in.

He might not be the type of guy to pour out his heart to you, but when it comes to getting to know you, and you getting to know him, he peels back his layers and tells you things about who he is and what makes him, him.

7. He doesn’t dominate the conversation.

A nice guy knows that there must be a balance in communication. He knows when to stop and let you speak, when to listen, and when to ask questions. Though he might get fired up about certain topics, he always lets you put in your two cents, too, and he’ll never make you feel as if what you have to say is less important. He values both your opinion, and you.

8. He won’t play games with your head.

If he’s a genuinely nice guy, he won’t care for games. If he’s into you, he’ll tell you. And if things aren’t working out, he’ll be upfront about that as well. He’s not going to be the guy that texts you non-stop one day and then ghosts on your next date—when he’s in it, he’s in it for real.

9. He does things for you without expectations or strings attached.

When a person genuinely cares for someone, (this goes for males or females), they will shower that person with gifts. These don’t have to be extravagant—it can be anything from kisses to a new pair of Nikes—but a genuinely nice guy will definitely want to show you that he cares for you in more ways than one. And he does these things out of the kindness of his own heart, without asking for anything in return.

10. He lets you know how he’s feeling.

A guy that’s uninterested will be guarded and removed. A nice guy will let you know that he’s enjoying his time with you, that he’s enjoying you, and that you mean something to him.

11. He can talk to you about the future without balking.

Whether you just started dating or you’re in it for a good amount of time, a genuinely nice guy won’t freak out at any mention of the future. He’s okay with discussing the terms of a potential long-distance relationship when you’re studying abroad in India for the upcoming summer, or making plans for New Years’ when it’s only October. Though it doesn’t necessarily mean he’s totally comfortable planning out your relationship that far in advance, he is open to the idea because he’s serious, and genuinely interested in you.