10 Characteristics To Look For In A Man You Can Grow Old With


1. He doesn’t just make you feel comfortable.

The man you can grow old with feels familiar and safe. But also terribly exciting. Kissing him every morning is a part of your daily routine, but you still get a little jolt in your stomach every time.

He’s the guy you can see yourself with on Saturday mornings, snuggled up and eating brunch on the couch. But he’s also the man you can imagine skydiving with, imagine kissing in foreign countries, imagine in a thousand new and intriguing places you haven’t yet been.

2. He challenges you.

He doesn’t always agree; in fact, the longer you are together, the more you’ll butt heads. And this is good.

Whether your relationship is built on similar values or not, he will still argue with you, still push you to think in different ways, and still drive you crazy. Your relationship won’t be static and boring, but will always shift between calm and beautifully complicated.

3. He doesn’t make you feel perfect.

He will tell you when you’re dead wrong, he won’t regard you as this larger-than-life person, and he won’t expect you to always be pristine and put together. You will feel human with him, real with him. And he will love you for the flawed, stubborn, disheveled person you are.

4. He inspires you.

His ambition pushes you; his pride in you motivates you to be ever-improving. You feed off one another’s energies and you both are continually growing.

5. He doesn’t see you as the center of his universe.

You are not the only reason for his happiness or the sole force behind all his decisions. He sees you not as his everything, but as his partner and his equal. Which is even better.

6. He really listens.

Focused, non-distracted listening, with eye contact and conversation.

7. He has genuine care for the world.

Not solely for you, but for your families, for your friends, for the strangers you meet. These people, these things you encounter bless your lives immensely and he acknowledges this.

8. He is curious.

About you, his life, his work and his passions.

9. He doesn’t leave you questioning.

You know him. Really know him, and all his imperfections. You know his past, the places he’s been, and you fully trust him, as he trusts you.

He is faithful and loyal. And even in this broken world, you have no reason to doubt him.

10. He makes you feel so many complicated emotions at once.

Not just the basic love or happiness, but passion and fear, bliss and anxiety, wholeness and frustration and intensity and comfort. He isn’t just the man you have fun with, but the man you get angry with, cry with, explore with. Loving him is a feeling you cannot describe. And he is somehow both simple and complex.

There’s no other way to say it—with him you just know. Thought Catalog Logo Mark

Marisa is a writer, poet, & editor. She is the author of Somewhere On A Highway, a poetry collection on self-discovery, growth, love, loss and the challenges of becoming.

Keep up with Marisa on Instagram, Twitter, Amazon and marisadonnelly.com

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