“We have so much in common!”
If commonalities are what is holding your relationship together, I’m already bored.
Sure, commonalities mean you probably agree more than you disagree. You probably hike together, or work out together or knit together. You watch the same type of movies, and you never have to branch out. Why limit yourself that way?
Date someone who doesn’t like the same everything as you. Maybe he loves working out and your idea of a workout is walking to the mailbox. Maybe he loves horror films and you can’t get enough musicals. By dating this person, you’ll be forced to step out of your comfort zone and walk on the treadmill one day. He might even learn to appreciate a good song and dance in the middle of an ordinary conversation. Plus, once you find a show, movie, band, etc. that you both enjoy, it will be so much more special.
Date someone who gives you space. He likes to hang out with a large group of friends, you’re into more intimate gatherings. Spend time apart to do your own things. Allow for independence so that you’re so much happier when you’re together. Don’t force yourselves to like something you will never like, but show an interest in their passions.
Date someone who doesn’t think the same way as you. You’re a planner and a by-the-book kind of girl. He’s spontaneous and free. His easygoing nature will help you to relax and enjoy the moment, rather than just planning the next step. Your careful deliberation will help him take more responsibility and push him to think about the next step.
Date someone who stimulates you. Force each other to open up your minds and hearts and allow room for other beliefs. Get excited at the fact that you don’t know everything and that someone else can teach you new things. Date someone who excites you and draws you in effortlessly.
Date someone who challenges you. Apply for the job you feel under qualified for; he believes in you and you should to. Face your fears together; go bungee jumping to get that feeling of letting go. Argue when you disagree; your arguments will push you both to think more deeply about the conversation and see the root cause more than the trigger point.
Date someone who complements you. (And I don’t mean he’s calls you pretty – although he should do that too!) Date someone who fulfills the needs you cannot fulfill yourself. Date someone who understands your desires. Date someone who makes you feel like all the little broken parts of you are whole again. Date someone whose heart may be cracked for different reasons, but in all the same places.