24 Cheaters Reveal How They Ended Up In A Happy Relationship With The Person They Had An Affair With

Found on AskReddit.

1. It may have started off wrong, but I’ve never met someone so perfect for me.

“I had just moved back to Florida from Boston. I was hanging out with some friends at a bar they were regulars at.

I met the bartender and ended up going to a party at his house after the bar closed with some friends. It was a usual weekend thing apparently. I thought the bartender was so cute but he had a girlfriend. We got to know each other and the sexual chemistry was just so damn strong.

On the 4th of July he and I were texting and he was stressing out about the fireworks as he is an Army veteran and they gave him Iraq/Afghanistan flashbacks. His girlfriend was busy with her son doing normal celebrations and wasn’t interested in his feelings at the time. We met up and went out drinking all night.

That’s when it started. We started having sex and I’d stay over, we’d send each other dirty texts. She found out and hated me, obviously. He broke up with her and we started talking more seriously. After a month I told him we were going to be exclusive or I was done.

Four years later we’re married and he’s at the park right now with our daughter having fun on Father’s Day. It may have started off wrong but I’ve never met someone so perfect for me. He said as soon as he met me he knew he was in trouble and that I was his future. Turns out he was right.”


2. It was the first time that I enjoyed sex with another person, ever.

“I was a freshman in college, still dating my high school boyfriend who was back home working because he didn’t want to go to college. He was a huge stoner, but a nice guy. He was who I lost my virginity to, but he didn’t really ever care about getting me off during sex, unfortunately. I was young enough to not understand that not all guys are that way. When I moved into my dorm, I met a guy on my floor who was my roommate’s friend from high school in another state and we hit it off pretty much immediately and became really good friends. My high school boyfriend would visit every other weekend or so with his friend, and we would do things around town with a couple of my roommates or this friend.

Being a stoner, my high school boyfriend would always want to smoke with his friend while he was visiting, and I don’t smoke. So essentially every weekend he visited eventually became a routine of him arriving, us having terrible sex, and then he would go smoke with his friend and come back, then we would go out and eat dinner, see a movie, or whatever. He was emotionally distant, and it got to a point where I felt like he was only in the relationship for the sexual component and that he loved his weed more than he loved me. I turned to the guy I had met from my floor who was now a good friend for advice, he came and sat with me in my dorm room while we both drank and I ranted, and we ended up sleeping together. It was the first time that I enjoyed sex with another person, ever.

I point blank asked my high school boyfriend the next day if he was serious about this relationship at all, and when he gave some bullshit excuse I dumped him. I’ve never told him that I cheated on him. I’m still with the guy I left him for, 5 years later, and we live together and plan on getting engaged once I finish grad school.”


3. He ended up being everything I felt I was missing in my relationship.

“My ex-fiancee and I had just moved to Kansas so that he could be closer to his family, because he had moved to where I was going to school and hated it. I left behind scholarships and transferred colleges at his request. When we got to Kansas, nothing improved. The mismatch of our libidos made everything worse. So I started looking on Tinder. I met a guy for what I thought was a fuck date. He ended up being everything I felt I was missing in my relationship. I kept going back for 2 weeks, every day (the sex was amazing) before I realized it wasn’t going to stop and I had to end things with my fiancee. I broke up with him, but never told him I cheated. We’re both so much better off now. He married one of his exes and is really happy. They’re perfect for eachother. The guy I cheated on him with is my husband now, and we’re expecting a baby girl this month.”


4. I’ve been with the other girl ever since and it was the best decision I ever made.

“Dated for 2 years in college. She graduated early and left. We’d always had issues and fought a lot. She was head over heels for me but I’ll be honest I didn’t feel the same for her. Plus we fought a lot, as I mentioned. Girl had a temper. Anyway, it’s my birthday and she’s away and of course we had fought all that week. She grudgingly wished me a happy bday. I went out with friends and hooked up with a friend my other friend invites. She slept over but we didn’t have sex. Next day I told her what happened. She was livid. Next month was pure hell and eventually after a month I realized I couldn’t deal with it anymore and left her. I’ve been with the other girl ever since and it was the best decision I ever made.”


5. The ex-spouse was a nightmare. Abuse included. The current SO showed me how I should’ve been treated.

“First. I don’t regret cheating at all. I knew the marriage was over before I met the current significant other. The ex-spouse was a nightmare. Abuse included. The current SO showed me how I should’ve been treated. Life is much better and I’m safe.”


6. We connected in a way I didn’t think was possible & he made me feel something I had never felt.

“I had been dating a guy on & off for 2 years back in high school. in high school, I had made a friend & she had a really hot brother, but he didn’t live in our city. I had met him once when I joined her for a concert. I flirted with him the whole time I was there. I felt guilty, but I couldn’t stop. Ultimately, nothing happened. I returned back home from the concert & put him out of my mind for the time being & continued my relationship with my ex. 1 year later, I graduated high school & my friend & I were set to attend college orientation together. her brother attended the college we were going to & he offered to let us stay in his apartment for orientation week. I was pretty excited because I still had a crush on her brother, but I tried not to show it. during that week, I got to know him more & the more I got to know him, the more I liked him. we connected in a way I didn’t think was possible & he made me feel something I had never felt. as bad as it sounds, during that week, my ex was just a bother. I didn’t want to talk to him because at this point, I was really falling for this guy. I couldn’t help myself, we ended up kissing & admitting to each other that we liked each other. after I returned from orientation, I couldn’t put him out of my mind. we would text & FaceTime every day. my ex found about him after I had broken up with him & while it was messy, in a way I don’t regret it because I am so incredibly happy with my boyfriend now. I truly think this is who I was meant to be with.”


7. He kissed me. It wasn’t an amazing kiss. It was a bit rushed. But it changed my life.

“I had been seeing my boyfriend for about 6 months. I was 20 at the time and my first serious relationship. He was everything I thought I wanted in a man—reliable job, had a car, not crazy or drank too much (I really could pick them back then). But then he started putting the subtle emotional abuses on me. Things like I couldn’t hang out with my work friends, I could only stay at his place he never wanted to stay at mine, it was all about him and his life and I was to slot right in there and support him and so what he wanted.

I then started talking more and more with a guy at work. He was the head chef and I was the bartender. We just seemed to have a connection. We were total opposites didn’t have much in common. Head chef asked me to hang out with him. I thought yeah why not. I wasn’t expecting anything to happen. We had dinner played pool had some drinks. Then he kissed me. It wasn’t an amazing kiss. It was a bit rushed. But it changed my life. I ended up going back to his place and we talked and hung out and we fell asleep together.

Now I was in a pickle. I was intoxicated by this head chef. He made me think and feel things that I didn’t know I could. But I had a boyfriend. I took the next day to think about things on my own. Then I ended up breaking up with my boyfriend. It was hard and sad but the right thing to do. I told the head chef I did that. And we could start hanging out and see what happens.

So we did start hanging. We had a rocky start. Many ups and downs with a break thrown in. But 9 years later and we’re married with a 2 year old and another one on the way.

I’m so glad he came into my life. We were both what we needed. We both made each other grow up but in different ways. He is and always will be the love of my life.”


8. I met someone that was basically my female twin and we hit it off instantly.

“I just met someone so much better for me. I met someone that was basically my female twin and we hit it off instantly. I ended up breaking up with the girl I was with and dating her for 6 months. Turns out there’s such a thing as ‘too much alike.’”


9. I met a man at work who I was instantly attracted to on a mental and a physical level—something I’d never had with my husband.

“I was in a dud of a marriage. I married too young and against my better judgment. My husband was a controlling and sexually repressed man who did not respect me and I did not respect him.

I found out that my husband was on dating sites and talking to women online attempting to solicit dates. He was actively seeking to cheat and the only thing stopping him from taking it to a physical realm was the fact that none of the women were interested in him.

We worked on our marriage over the years to try to resolve his online cheating, but he’d always start up again. Eventually I got so emotionally worn out by it that I just didn’t have it in me to care much anymore.

I met a man at work who I was instantly attracted to on a mental and a physical level—something I’d never had with my husband. We started out with harmless conversations and became work friends. We then found excuses to text each other when not at work. We’d grab lunch together here and there…at first with groups and then with just the two of us. I couldn’t wait to go to work every day and see him. I thought about him all the time. I knew I was heading toward dangerous ground but I didn’t want to stop.

We started flirting and I began to sneak away from home to meet up with him for hikes, dinner, you name it. I met up with him for hours at a time on evenings and weekends, and my husband never really noticed because his attention was always occupied with his friends or his online chats with women.

My friend from work and I were always careful not to make physical contact, until one day in his car when he leaned over to help me with my jammed seat belt and he kissed me. It was the most amazing thing I’d ever felt in my life.

Over the next few weeks meeting up to have dinner turned into meeting up to find a secluded spot and make out in his car. Then that eventually turned into groping, hand jobs, oral sex…you get the idea. I could not get enough of this guy.

I felt tremendously guilty the entire time because I never thought of myself as the type who would cheat. I came clean with my husband before my affair progressed any deeper. I broke off the affair and agreed to try marriage counseling. I quickly changed my mind when during the course of an argument (I didn’t want to go to his church and he wanted me to) my husband slapped me and told me I wasn’t allowed to have any unsupervised visits with my family or friends anymore.

After I told my husband I wanted a divorce, he attempted to destroy my life. He tried to get me fired, told all the neighbors and everyone at his church what happened, posted our business on Facebook tagging my friends and family, you name it. He also threatened to ‘beat up’ the guy I had been cheating with which, honestly, would have only ended up in severe embarrassment and injury for himself.

It didn’t take long after filing divorce papers for me to hook back up with my friend and officially start dating him. My husband harassed and threatened us both until my boyfriend called his bluff and then he just sort of faded out.

My boyfriend is now my husband and we have been together for 10 years and going strong. I love him more than anything and I respect him more than anyone I’ve ever met. I would never dream of cheating on him and I feel confident that he’d never cheat on me.

tldr: It started because I was married to a jackass and it was a disaster, but it ended well for me.”


10. She made me a believer in the idea of love at first sight.

“I was young—19. I had been with a girl for a year when my parents decided I needed to pay rent, so I found a roommate and got an apartment. Day 1 I go to the office to turn in my walk-through paperwork. The girl in the office made my heart skip….She made me a believer in the idea of love at first sight.

She moved in across from my apartment a couple weeks later and we started to hang out. One night we slept together. The next day I broke up with my girlfriend. Me and new girl talked and we both wanted to be together.

She moved in with me a month later. That was 17 years ago. She’s currently asleep upstairs next to our daughter.”


11. We’ve been married for ten years now and are still very happy.

“I had an affair with a coworker that was significantly older than me. We were both in very unhappy relationships, he with a woman whose spending habits spent them into multiple mortgages and me with a man that was rapidly developing a serious drug habit. It took about a year before anybody caught on. Coworkers started noticing, he eventually ended up in a round of layoffs. I got caught first and my boyfriend moved out. Not long after that, he filed for divorce from his wife and moved in with me. It was a vicious divorce that ended up lasting years. We’ve been married for ten years now and are still very happy. His ex is doing great also.”


12. When he kissed me goodbye, I just knew.

“A few years ago, I met this amazing guy. Let’s call him Guy A. Fell very much in love with him, he was so kind and sweet. We kissed a few times and hooked up once, but he was starting to see this other girl, so it never went further than that. I was pretty heartbroken over it.

Fast forward a few years. I’m a year and a half into this horrible relationship. We’ll call him Shithead. Shithead is a compulsive liar, yells at me, threatens to break up every time I do something he doesn’t like, like whenever I had a panic attack.

I’m at a concert without Shithead and I look across the dance floor, and I see Guy A, dancing his heart out, laughing and just being amazing. Hadn’t seen him since the time we hooked up, which was a few years ago. My heart skipped a beat. I approached him, we talked for hours, and I told him I was living with a really shitty guy and that I wanted out. When he kissed me goodbye, I just knew.

I continued the relationship with my Shithead for about a week (while still seeing the other guy on the side) before I finally worked up the courage to break up with him.

I’ve been with Guy A ever since, and haven’t looked back once.”


13. Me and the other girl have been married for 5 years, and my ex is married to a woman.

“Was living with my girlfriend at uni. Towards the end of my degree I had a field trip abroad and a good friend and I realized we maybe would have liked to be more than that. Got home, said to my gf that I wasn’t sure things were working and I needed some time. We had our finals to do and I didn’t want to screw those up for her so didn’t dump her outright. Meanwhile the other girl and I got closer and a few things happened.

Eventually, after our exams were done I broke up with my gf, adamantly denying there was someone else. Now, 12 years later me and the other girl have been married for 5 years, and my ex is married to a woman.”


14. He begged me not to move to be with my boyfriend and grabbed me and kissed me. So I kissed him back. Again and again and again.

“My long-term boyfriend and I had to be long distance for about a year. At first it was fine, but then we started working opposite hours, and he stopped responding to my texts. I missed him immensely. And it’s not like I played hard to get or coy, I messaged him frequently and told him that I wanted to talk to him more, have Skype dates. I guess I didn’t communicate how important I thought that was to our relationship.

In addition to that, although I was planning to move 600 miles away from all my friends and family to be with him, and we’d been dating for nearly 5 years he still got awkward when I brought up getting married.

Cue my male friend from my college program. Our program was pretty rigorous. We basically had to teach 2 high school classes M-T and had master levels classes on Fridays. Oh, and our work was unpaid. We commiserated and drank cheap beer together and watched movies played board game etc. Pretty much on the weekends we were attached at the hip. At this point, I was probably emotionally cheating (he played with my hair, I tickled him, took naps in his bed) but we hadn’t passed a physical threshold yet

The last day of our program he begged me not to move to be with my boyfriend and grabbed me and kissed me. So I kissed him back. Again and again and again. I called my then boyfriend 3 hours later and said I had to end it because I cheated. My then boyfriend said ‘We can work through this’ and I said ‘I don’t want to.’

That was 2 years ago. I’m marrying my friend from my program in a couple months. I wish I wouldn’t have let my resentment of being ignored fester because I felt pretty blank while breaking up with him. I wish I would have done it sooner so I didn’t hurt him as badly. But tis life.”


15. I really needed to get laid…it had been about 6 months. At least.

“My ex-husband and I weren’t even sleeping in the same room when I met my affair. Ex just wasn’t interested in sex—and it was causing so many fights because I was so unsatisfied.

I met my affair on WoW, and we knew each other for about a year and had never flirted or anything like that. One day I found out that he had Settlers of Catan and mozzarella sticks…and lived an hour and a half away. I hopped in the car and drove down and we hit it off really well.

He didn’t know I was married at the time. I really needed to get laid…it had been about 6 months. At least.

The affair never ended. Or I guess it officially ended when my divorce was finalized. He and I are married now and have been together for six years.”


16. We hooked up that night and it just felt right.

“I was friends with this guy, we’ll call him Trevor, for a long time. 4 or 5 years. He’s 3 years younger than me, when we first met (at work) I was 19 and he was 16. I always thought he was cute but the age difference at that time was too much. When I was 23 and he was getting ready to turn 21, it didn’t seem so bad. We’d been hanging out a lot and were both single.

One night I told him I was confused about our friendship and had feelings for him. I thought he wouldn’t be interested, but he was. We kissed right before he left and decided to see where things would take us.

The next night he came over and was acting weird. He eventually said he was too scared to lose me, to risk our friendship. I told him to gtfo, I was pissed, hurt, and embarrassed. I couldn’t understand why he didn’t just tell me no the first time.

We stopped hanging out for a few weeks, then he begged for my forgiveness. I had truly missed him too and thought I would be okay with being just friends with him.

A few weeks later, i started hanging out with a new group of guys. One of them, Matt, eventually made a move on me and we started sleeping together. He said he didn’t want a relationship. I told him that was fine. Matt and Trevor had already met through me and our whole friend group hung out a lot.

I told Trevor about Matt. He seemed upset and another friend mentioned that Trevor had asked if Matt and i were serious.

After about a month of just hooking up, Matt told me he was in love with me and wanted to be with me. I didn’t say it back but I agreed to be his girlfriend.

Matt was not the world’s best bf. Two days after being official I saw Tinder notices on his phone. We talked about it and he said that was from when we weren’t official. Okay fair enough. He deleted it.

We went out with friends to a club. A girl showed up who i had used to work with, who was very flirty. She kind of attached to our group. I warned Matt about her and asked him to give her a wide berth. I went to the bathroom and when i came back, she had her arm around him and he was exchanging snapchat names with her. Wtf? My friend Harry who was with us also told me that Matt had danced with another girl when i was gone as well. Matt later denied this and told me to call Harry and ask. Harry again confirmed that Matt had danced with another girl.

One night he was getting snaps from someone who he identified as an ex. I told him I was uncomfortable with that and he made the choice to delete her. Except he kept getting snaps from her. I saw there was a saved convo from a few days before we were exclusive telling her he missed her ass. I attempted to break up with him then, but he begged me for forgiveness so i forgave him.

He also would constantly stare at other girls to the point where I’d become very insecure. Not just a glance, I’m talking he wouldn’t even make eye contact with me while we were having a conversation because he was being so creepy. One night it was so bad i again tried to break up with him but he said he would change.

Trevor , Harry and i went out together about 5 months into my relationship with Matt. Trevor confessed that he was in love with me, he couldn’t stand how Matt was treating me. He said when he’d changed his mind before he’d been struggling with an Adderall problem and he was scared he was going to mess everything up. Honestly I’d never really gotten over my feelings for him…We hooked up that night and it just felt right.

I broke up with Matt the next day. It was hard, I felt terrible about cheating on him. He fought the breakup for weeks after. He did everything he could to get me back, including saying he was planning on proposing.

Trevor and i are still together, almost two years later and we’re doing great. Initially we had a lot of problems stemming from how we got together. I was scared he’d change his mind. He was scared I would do to him what I did to Matt. If I could go back and never date Matt, I would. Or at least have broken up with him one of the many times I tried to before we actually ended. And i still feel shitty about it because despite how terrible of a bf he was, no one deserves to be cheated on.

So if you’re in a relationship that’s unhappy to the point that you’d cheat, or you have feelings for someone else… just get out. You are not trapped, even if it feels like it.”


17. It’s a relationship like none other I’ve had. We’re so open and honest with each other.

“I was in an abusive relationship, where I got beat up on, locked in the bathroom, held down, etc… I had no life, it was just work, baby, beat down, rinse/repeat. I was put down so badly, I didn’t even consider myself a human being anymore. But I thought I had to make it through, stick with it, because that’s what my mom did for 30 years. We all lived in such an abusive environment. So to me, this was normal. Even though I had hysterical breakdowns, was suicidal every day, and was held against my will, it was normal.

Then one day, I snapped. I went online to find friends. All I wanted was a friend to talk to, and I knew I couldn’t have a real-life person friend, it had to be internet. But I also wanted the temptation of knowing that if I made a friend, they could be close by.

Me being naive, I went on an ‘adult friend finder’ website. Haahaa.

I had found someone genuine, and caring, and healthy. And they helped make me feel like maybe I could be a person. And romantic feelings quickly developed.

I gathered up enough courage to leave. It wasn’t easy, very messy. There’s still a whole bunch of kinks that need to be worked out.

I live alone with my daughter, but the ex gets my baby (now 3, she was 1 when this happened) while I work during the day, and gets 2 overnights every week. Everyone always tells me I should file for child support, but I just can’t. The thought of it makes me want to throw up from nervousness. I don’t want to be in the same room as that guy, asking for money he won’t even give out for our kid. He’d rather spend it on drugs. But I just can’t. He scares me too much.

But otherwise, I still have a healthy happy relationship with the person I had met on the internet! It’s a relationship like none other I’ve had. We’re so open and honest with each other. There’s still speed bumps, but I would never expect perfection. He’s an absolute dream working with my kid! I’m glad I cheated, so I could get out of hell, and start feeling like a human again!”


18. I quickly fell for him and his wonderful personality.

“I had been serious with a guy for about a year and a half. Things in the relationship were terrible he was emotionally and physically abusive. Now I’m not an idiot, I tried to break it off for almost a year. I knew the relationship was bad for me. But, every time I tried to he would manipulate me back with various threats.

Well one day I met this other brilliant guy, he immediately saw right through all the bullshit, walls, and fake smiles. I quickly fell for him and his wonderful personality. It was my fault, we just clicked with each other and became very close friends, I kissed him whilst still being with the abusive dick but despite everything my ex did to me I still felt bad. Eventually I managed to break up with the ex—not through lack of trying!

I’m still with my SO, it has been 5 years now. I feel bad still, it wasn’t at all my SO’s fault. He was very innocent and was only trying to save me.”


19. I am happy to say that I divorced my ex and am still with the guy I met. We have been together 6 years now.

“TL:DR Married the guy I was cheating with.

My ex husband and I were probably never meant to be, we were young and dumb and not looking ahead, we married. 3 years and a kid later, I was miserable and he couldn’t understand why. I saw the handwriting on the wall, he didn’t. We were not on the same path, had very different goals.

We separated and tried marriage counseling which didn’t help. I started seeing someone else during this separation period. We had already discussed divorce but yes, we were still married.

The new guy I started seeing was 5 years older than me and we just clicked. I could finally be myself and as we discussed our aspirations and goals I could see that he was someone who was much more aligned with where I wanted to go and would be supportive instead of being me down, like my ex.

I am happy to say that I divorced my ex and am still with the guy I met. We have been together 6 years now. We married 3 years ago this August. We are life partners, soul mates. We see eye to eye on all the big important stuff in life. My life has changed drastically for the better in the last 6 years. I have accomplished dreams that never would have happened with my ex. We just weren’t right for each other.

The ex and I had a very nasty divorce and a rough few years. It took a long time to tolerate each others existence. He was very angry and hurt by the breakup and reacted poorly causing a rift that took years to heal. I worked diligently to keep our daughter from feeling the tension or being harmed by the negativity. She is an amazing child, so I’d say I succeeded. New husband is an amazing step dad.

So, it has all worked out for me, but there was a lot of pain and suffering along the way. Was it still worth it? Yes. Oh my god, yes.”


20. We both divorced and are very happy together.

“My relationship was strained with the wife. Hadn’t had sex in years. Got talking to one of my best friends about her strained marriage as well. Things got intimate after a few years. We both divorced and are very happy together.”


21. I’m a lot happier than I was before. So I guess it all turned out pretty well.

“I was married and really unhappy (long backstory that isn’t super important, and probably books down to poor communication). I flirted with a couple of our friends, jokingly at first but more seriously as time went on. After a while I asked my husband if I could sleep with them, and he told me I could do whatever I wanted, just don’t tell him about it. Since this was obviously passive aggressiveness, I waited around a month and asked again to make sure the answer wouldn’t change. When I asked again he said the same thing, I decided I didn’t care enough at this point to not just take it at face value, so I ended up telling the guy I was flirting with and we had sex. Anyway, my marriage ended, I actually have a job now, me and the other guy have been together for about two years now, and I’m a lot happier than I was before. So I guess it all turned out pretty well.”


22. Knowing that I had a place to go gave me the courage to file for divorce.

“Started with me (married for 7 years) met him at work. I had long since fallen out of love with my husband but never left because I had a pretty sweet thing going (big house, big income, etc…). About a month before I met the man I cheated with, I discovered a secret email account logged in on his laptop through which he was soliciting sex from a Craigslist hooker. That was it for me. Rather than leaving, I started sleeping with my coworker. This led to me finding every excuse I could to get out of the house and go see him. My coworker and I had agreed we simply had a FWB thing going, but as time moved on we discussed what things would be like if I left my husband. We could be roommates since his current roommate was getting married. Knowing that I had a place to go gave me the courage to file for divorce. After I filed, my coworker broke down and told me he loved me. I loved him too. We have been together for 5 years now and are married. I wish I could say I regret cheating, but I don’t. I’m happy.”


23. Cheated on her with someone who I didn’t expect to fall in love with.

“Started: Girlfriend at the time held financial interest over me and made it so I couldn’t leave without losing many prized possessions.

What happened? Cheated on her with someone who I didn’t expect to fall in love with. I made it blatantly obvious in hopes that my girlfriend would break up with me.

Following: Girlfriend found my computer unlocked, opened on facebook with the girl recently added as a friend. (Coincidence??)—She found her number, abused her, called me at work (at like 5am) and abused me and told me to get home.

Conclusion: She begged me to stay.. I had no way of controlling my financial interest which she also threatened me with & I ended up staying for this reason.

FAST-FORWARD TO 1.5 years later: Currently seeing the girl I cheated on my gf with because I was so in love after the first date. I am incredibly infatuated with her and can’t believe she actually accepted me back into her life (Given the circumstances) and is giving me a chance to see her. I’ve never been happier and I want this to last forever.

Clarification Edit: I broke up with my girlfriend about a year later (After acquiring financial interest on my property), messaged the other girl… Explained everything to her, she actually said yes and we started seeing each other… I have no ill-intentions and I am only interested in this girl…

Further: I seriously thought about this girl every day from the day I met her to this very day and I thought I may have over-hyped it… I was wrong.. I didn’t over hype it at all and I am so happy with life after chasing her.”


24. We fell in love over a few months. It became clear that we wanted to be together.

“My wife was abusive, cold, controlling, and overall terrible. I am an easy to control guy, and she took advantage of that. I told her that she makes my life shit, she didn’t care. I didn’t leave her, because we had a little girl (~6 months), and leaving my wife would have meant leaving my daughter as well as she was still breastfeeding. My wife hated being a mom. It has always been me who wanted a kid; I think she just liked the idea of not having to work. I came to the realization that if our life continued on this path, my daughter and I would have a shit life.

I found emotional support in a single mother coworker. We fell in love over a few months. It became clear that we wanted to be together. I showed her my daughter, I started to build a relationship with her daughter. She assured me that she would stand by me if I was going to have to fight for the custody of my daughter. We started having sex. I manipulated my wife to stop breastfeeding our daughter. This was extremely easy as this meant that I could take care of her at evenings and at night, so she didn’t have to, and she could also go out partying.

Then I told her I was cheating on her. She forgave me in about two minutes and told me she wanted to stay together. I left her. Now it’s been a while, we are divorced, I’m getting married to my coworker, legally adopting her daughter. She calls me ‘dad’. My daughter is with us 5 days out of 7. My ex started working, and seems to be doing much better than before. I’m the happiest I’ve ever been.

I now, I’m supposed to be pretty shitty, but in my mind, I just had to do it. I had to leave that abusing asshole. I felt alone, and found someone. There was no overlap, I didn’t even kiss my wife after I’ve decided to pursue my coworker (which she didn’t even notice BTW). Now my daughter and I live in a family where we can be happy. Soon she’ll have a little brother too.”

Jopagaj Thought Catalog Logo Mark

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