14 People Confess To How They Became Cheaters And Why Most Don’t Plan On Stopping

7. He’s Sexually Adventurous, She Isn’t

I am a frequent cheater on my wife with escorts. I am sexually adventurous, my wife isn’t. I rationalize it as getting from them what my wife can’t or isn’t willing to do. I rationalize that I’m not loving any of these women, I’m just using them for a service. I realize I’m a terrible person.

8. Sometimes You Just Fall In Love Even If Everything Is Great

I fell in love again. I am married, have been together for 25 years, since college. I love my husband and have never ever considered cheating. I have had many offers over the years but have always refused. I have never even been tempted. Usually what comes to mind is that I am flattered and take it as a compliment. I can always imagine these men with someone else and honestly hope they will find happiness like I have. I am still happy in my marriage; I am not angry or upset with my husband for any reason which is why this is so confusing to me. I have NEVER planned this, I didn’t look for this, I did not seek this out I never had any intention of ever cheating. I have been seeing a therapist to try and figure out why I am feeling this way but it has not helped at all.

Back story, Married 20+ years most happy normal ups and downs like any marriage. Children are in college. Husband travels and is away for months at a time but we Facetime almost daily. I am independent and manage the household on my own. I work from home and travel for work once or twice a year. Man I cheated with is a client but won’t be much longer as I am leaving the company.

Here we go… Last year while away for work I met one of my clients. He had some questions about how to best use our product for his company. The moment I met him I was flooded with a feeling I had not had before. Strange really but this is how it all started. While answering his many questions I could not take my eyes off of his and his adorable smile. He had so many questions I am sure he started making them up on the spot just to keep talking to me and I loved it. He gave me some to research and I now had a reason to speak to him the next day. The next time I saw him we talked about work then he started telling me about himself. I made excuses to see and talk to him a few times while we were there and the last night we spent hours together taking and laughing with other coworkers. He walked me to my room and I let him in… We talked and he tried to kiss me. This man completely took my breath away. I felt like a teenager again. My stomach was in knots and my mouth was dry I was blushing constantly and could barely form a coherent sentence. Oh I wanted him so bad but I refused. I apologized for leading him on and told him I was married and just could not do this. He was respectful and left. I said I hoped to see him at the next conference but I hoped he might come with a girlfriend next year because I may not be able to refuse a second time. I honestly wished him well and was hopeful he would find a kind beautiful woman to make him happy.

Since he walked out my door I have not been able to stop thinking about him. He pops into my head out of the blue and I catch my breath and get butterflies. I can’t explain it and I figure in time this will stop and these feelings will go away, but they never do, it has been a year now.

Since he still had some work questions I needed to answer I had to contact him once I returned from the conference. I sent a very professional email and tried to keep things on the up and up. We spoke on the phone, via text and email and each time I smiled so much my cheeks would hurt. We did flirt more and more but he lives so far away from me I just enjoyed it and didn’t think it would go anywhere. I assumed he would eventually find someone and forget about me, I mean what are the chances I would ever see him again. The more we spoke the more I fell for him.

I started seeing a therapist because I felt so guilty about having feelings form someone that wasn’t my husband I just didn’t know why. I am happy and comfortable; my life is essentially on cruise control right now so why can’t I stop thinking about this man? I even went to far as to see my doctor and get my hormones checked thinking maybe I am hitting early menopause and my hormones are out of whack causing me to feel like this. I know that sounds crazy but I needed some explanation. By the way my hormone levels are completely normal and there is no sign of early menopause thank goodness.

A few months later I took a trip to his area and I met with a few customers. I was hoping to see him thinking this is my chance to set things right, just be his friend and move on. I didn’t get the chance to see him on that trip which was probably a good thing.

A few months after that I was back to meet with another customer and I did have the opportunity to see him but things did not go as I planned. I was hoping to go out and maybe have some dinner, chat and just be silly. I could not wait to see him; I was so excited like a school girl. We met at his place so we could take one car and while I was there we caught up a little talking about what’s been going on in our lives then he showed me around. I was so nervous, blushing the whole time and smiling like a total goof. Eventually he asked me for a hug so I gave him one and he kissed me. I said I couldn’t but then just went with it. Needless to say we never left the house. We talked and played for hours, the best part was just being in his arms and talking, I wanted to stay there forever.

Honestly if he asked me to leave and be with him I would. I want to be his and only his but I am too afraid to tell him how I feel just yet. I have written him a letter but don’t have the nerve to send it. On one hand why would I be so stupid as to ruin a perfectly good and until now happy marriage, risk everything, and in the end hurt my family and possibly wind up alone? I mean why would he want to be with me in a serious relationship as I essentially just proved that I am not a trustworthy person. I have been faithful to one man for 25 years and now that doesn’t count for anything. He has no reason to trust me. On the other hand we only have one life to lead so why shouldn’t I take this chance and possibly end up with someone who makes me so happy and who I want to make happy in return?

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  • http://eraserhead88.wordpress.com eraserhead88

    1. If you just fall in love with someone else while you are in relationship – it does mean this relationship just wasn’t right. It happens cause we get to know each other every day and not every time we feel like ‘this is it’.

    2. If someone’s cheating only because he/she was betrayed in the past – sorry, it’s not excuse for me. People are not toys. And I knew people in the past who picked the girl/boy, made her fell in love only because they wanted to break a heart… It’s awful. I believe in karma – everything goes back to us sooner or later. If someone has broken your heart – try to give as much as you can (good) to someone new.

    3. ‘Cheating has kept my marriage alive’ – that’s okay if both of them know about it and they don’t mind. For some people sex is just a sex and has nothing about love – I understand.

    4. ‘Cheaters cheat because they don’t respect themselves’ – sorry, but i think they just don’t know what ‘respect’ means. Its nothing about don’t respect themselves, it’s about don’t care about someone’s feelings. If you are with someone and you think about others just finish this! That person must be fun, clever, lovely or whatever if you decided hanging out with her/him, don’t ruin her/his heart, just say ‘goodbye’ in the right way.

  • http://dripcoffeecowgirl.wordpress.com drip-coffee-cowgirl

    Cheating is so pathetic. These fuckers should either call themselves polyamorous, cut off the relationship, or be honest and clear about their needs and work something out. The thing is, if you’re not going to be honest, you don’t deserve a significant other. These kinds of things really screw people up. Sounds like there’s a lot of immaturity in these “confessions”.

  • https://brenicojayblog.wordpress.com/2016/05/23/14-people-confess-to-how-they-became-cheaters-and-why-most-dont-plan-on-stopping/ 14 People Confess To How They Became Cheaters And Why Most Don’t Plan On Stopping – Lifestyle Writing
  • http://godisgreat.co/14-people-confess-to-how-they-became-cheaters-and-why-most-dont-plan-on-stopping/ 14 People Confess To How They Became Cheaters And Why Most Dont Plan On Stopping - God is Great!
  • http://divorce.sobeit.co.za/14-people-confess-to-how-they-became-cheaters-and-why-most-dont-plan-on-stopping/ 14 People Confess To How They Became Cheaters And Why Most Dont Plan On Stopping | Divorce
  • http://www.geekdaily.net/internet/14-people-confess-to-how-they-became-cheaters-and-why-most-dont-plan-on-stopping/ 14 People Confess To How They Became Cheaters And Why Most Dont Plan On Stopping | Geek Daily
  • http://allensrepositoryofstuff.wordpress.com allensrepositoryofstuff

    Never ceases to amaze me how people will fuck up a perfectly great relationship chasing something new or shiny. Man (or woman) up and realize that you do not have to bite every little tease that is offered. For many men, it is an ego trip to pick up lots of women.

  • http://www.viralblister.com/cheaters/ 14 People Confess To How They Became Cheaters And Why Most Dont Plan On Stopping - Viral Blister
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