1. 9 times out of 10, we want to pet your dog. If it’s not going to run away, let us get a little bit of love. We live for puppies.

2. No need to let us know “Oh and I left the tip on there..” we know exactly how much you tipped us — don’t point it out, we know. And thank you.

3. If you tip $1-$2 and someone else tipped us $4+, they are getting their food first.

4. Please for the love of God (especially in the winter) answer your door quickly. We are literally standing outside waiting for you to come to the door in snow, negative temperatures, rain, hail…come to the door in a hurried manner, PLEASE.

5. When I order food, I am GLUED to my phone. Why are you not? Don’t make us call you multiple times to come answer your door or come out of your apartment. Are you not starving? How do you not have your phone next to you? I do not get it.

6. If you’re not sure what to tip, think of what the price of a gallon of gas is. If gas is $3.50 a gallon, tip around that range for a smaller order.

7. You can never really go wrong with a $5 tip on an order under $40.

8. If the order is over $50, don’t give us $3…that’s rude. Would you tip $3 on a $50 tab in a restaurant? Same applies.

9. If you’re going to have someone sign your credit card slip for you (often in work settings/having a secretary sign for you) let them know how much you’d like to tip. They will usually give us ZERO for a tip if you do not tell them otherwise. And that sucks.

10. I’m talking a lot about tips but you have to realize, delivery drivers make MINIMUM WAGE. Tips are how we survive. How we fill up our gas tanks to bring you your food.

11. Answering the door nude is…not ideal.

12. No I cannot come in and smoke weed with you.

13. Yes I would love a beer but I am unable to accept it because I am a delivery DRIVER.

14. If you live in a big apartment complex and have a call-box, when you make an order give us your exact door code. We waste so much time trying to find your last name in a sea full of 7 other Smiths. And we had to go through 83 Anderson’s to get there.

15. If your food is late, there is a 90% chance it is not your driver’s fault, please do not take it out on us. Restaurants that have in-house dining AND delivery tend to get backed up faster because of the split. Be nice to us.

16. If you live where it snows, SHOVEL AND SALT your walk-ways/stairs. I almost die multiple times a night from walking down snowy stairs.

17. On timed/deferred orders, we give ourselves a 6-minute window on either side. If you want your food at 7:15, expect it anywhere from 7:09-7:21. That’s fair, right?

18. If you don’t leave us a tip, we definitely called you a name of some sort while we are walking back to our cars.

19. Are you really asking for change when you gave us a $20.00 and your bill was $19.86? C’mon.

20. Never SHORT US. That comes right out of our pockets. If you short us it is literally like we are paying you to come deliver your food to you. Jerks.

21. And the LAST thing that Delivery Drivers want YOU to know is: We really do appreciate you as customers, be cool to us and we’ll be cool back.