Maybe I’m Not Ready For Love Now, And That’s Okay

Maybe right now, I am not ready for love yet.

I am not ready to open my heart completely and unrestrainedly to let someone into my world. I am not ready to fall unknowingly into someone’s embrace and trusting they will catch me when I fall. I am not ready to be tied down with new obligations, responsibilities, and commitment when my soul yearns to be free.

I am not ready to get into a new relationship when I could still feel the sting of my wound and taste the bitterness of my past heartbreak. I am not ready to intertwine my life with another when there are so much more for me to accomplish and do. I am not ready to love another person when I am still struggling with self-love. I am not ready to settle down because I know that is not the only path out there and it is okay.

Maybe right now, I need to find myself and get to know who I am as a person.

I want to travel far beyond my comfort zone and be captivated with foreign lands, exhilarating experiences, and extraordinary sights. I want to be fully immersed in thrilling adventures and unforgettable escapades and live right here at this moment. I want to be swept away with the unparalleled beauty of Mother Nature and the magnitude of creation.

I want to meet new people from different walks of life and soak in their experiences and exchange stories. I want to fully focus on myself and dive deeply into the passions that invigorate me and push me to achieve greater heights. I absolutely want to fall in love with every inch of the amazing, fabulous, and incredible soul that I know I am. I want to become my own best friend, my biggest supporter, and to be always there for me. I want to find my true purpose and live a life well spent.

Maybe right now, I am loving my single life and enjoying my solitude a little too much.

Some days, I look at my friends who are in strong committed relationships and I wondered how it feels like to have that.

I wonder how it feels like to have someone who is there for me unconditionally and without reciprocal. I wonder how it feels like to have a relationship that lasts. I wonder how it is like to have someone who is able to accept every bit of my imperfect self. I wonder if it is possible for me to find someone of the same wavelength and whom I can have easy and deep conversation with. I wonder if I can find the love that is meant for me.

But those moments of uncertainty and self-doubt are fleeting. I am feeling the best I have been in a long time. For I know that when I meet my person, there will be no doubt on my mind and everything will fall into the right place.

When I meet them, I will be ready to let love in and I know I will love them to the best of my ability.