This Is How You’ll Lose Him, Based On His Love Language

Drew Wilson

1. Words Of Affirmation

While at one point you were perhaps free-flowing with your affectionate words, you’ll stop saying them as often. The compliments and praises that you used to shower them with unabashedly will fall to the side. He’ll occasionally fish for a compliment- an attempt at hearing any kind of validation, and while you may toss aside some half-hearted attempt at it, it won’t be the same as if it just came from you on your own. He will try to communicate this to you- telling you how he feels or expressing his affection to you in words, but you fail to grasp what he’s asking. You may go out of your way to do things for him, or surprise him with a gift, but you’ll forget to tell him how much he means to you, and it will eat away at him until he can’t take it anymore.

2. Quality Time

Towards the beginning of the relationship, you probably spent almost all of your time together- it was the only place you wanted to be. However, as time went on, schedules and life manage to get in the way and take up our time, which is completely understandable. Yet you lose him whenever you stop trying to carve out much time to be with him. You allow all the other things in your life take more and more priority, to the point where he questions if he really matters to you at the end of the day. You may reach out to hold his hand at times or tell him that you want to spend more time together, but in those moments where you are together, you’re distant-physically you’re sitting right beside him, but your mind and your attention are somewhere else entirely- and he can feel it. If the problem isn’t addressed, at some point he will feel like you would rather be anywhere else than with him, and he’ll decide it’s time to find someone else who does.

3. Physical Touch

There was probably a time where you couldn’t keep your hands off of him- and not in the way it sounds. While giving him a hug when you would first see him, snuggling up beside him on the couch, or giving him a backrub when he’s stressed out may have seemed so natural to do before, eventually the relationship cooled down, as they often do, and those things stopped coming to mind the way they used to. You surprise him with small gifts or cook him a really nice meal, but you barely even hold his hand or hardly let your bodies touch in any capacity when you’re together. You forget to kiss him before you leave unless he reminds you of it. At some point, he will start to believe more and more that you aren’t attracted to him, and worse, that you don’t really care for him as much as you might claim, and he will feel he has no choice but to walk away.

4. Receiving Gifts

There was most likely a time where you surprised him with tokens of your affection that reminded you of him- that book he couldn’t stop raving about wanting to read, the candy he could eat his weight in, a vinyl of his favorite album of all time- or when the holidays rolled around, you had the perfect gift for him, and tie as clear you had spent a lot of time selecting something that would really show how much you cared. Yet at some point, you didn’t think to surprise him with those things anymore. You may have felt like you needed to save money, but you missed the whole point- that the gifts were never about the monetary value, but the thought that went behind them. When special occasions do come around, your presents become less and less thoughtful- something you would purchase for just anybody, without much consideration used in the process. You may compliment him on his new promotion, or take him out to dinner just the two of you, but when it comes down to it, he feels like you don’t really know him, or think of him much when you’re not together, and he won’t be able to handle it anymore.

5. Acts Of Service

Maybe there was a time where you noticed he had a lot on his plate, and you went out of your way to help him. You would help clean up the kitchen, or take out the trash, or even help carry in the groceries, just because you knew he would appreciate it. Over time, though, those little thoughtful gestures started to slip your mind. You may have been caught up in your own things, which is understandable, but you stopped going out of your way to help him out unless he asked you to- and even then, you sometimes made it seem that the task was more out of obligation rather than showing you cared. You may hug him every chance you get or tell him how handsome he is and how important he is to you, but he won’t really believe it simply because he feels like he is always doing all of the actions with no help from you. He won’t be able to shake the idea that maybe you don’t love him as much as you say you do and decide he should find someone else who shows him love the way he needs to be. Thought Catalog Logo Mark

I am low-key obsessed with astrology more than is probably healthy

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