You Deserve More Than Someone Who Can’t Make Up His Mind About You

I know that honestly, he’s everything you have ever wanted. I get it, I do. The way he talks to you for hours on end—not just the superficial stuff, but the deep heart to hearts at 3 in the morning. The way he knows exactly what to say to turn your heart into a base drum that doesn’t know how to stop. The way that when you need him, he is there for you. The way he seems to care for you in ways no one else has before.

I know that he’s all that you have wanted for so long—you made up your mind on him long ago.

Yet he still can’t seem to make up his mind about you.

He cares for you. He’s told you so—he doesn’t think what you have is casual, or unimportant. He would rather talk to you than anyone else. He spends so much of his free time with you, and every moment together feels as natural as anything you’ve ever known. Yet he can’t seem to decide whether you two should fully go for it—to try out this love in a real way. He has his reasons and you even admit that they kind of make sense: the timing is off, he isn’t ready, he doesn’t want to ruin what you already have. He is quick to find reasons to wait, but slow to truly entertain the possibility of you two becoming something real. And you hold on, you give him time, because you don’t want to be the one to rush him, or come off as clingy or demanding.

But truly, you deserve more than someone who can’t make up their mind about you.

It is one thing to give someone time and space to work out a decision—we all need that from time to time. Making decisions that affect our lives require thought and even reflection to be certain we are ready, or at least ready to give it a shot. Yet if time after time, he finds yet another reason to place you on the backburner, then you shouldn’t keep holding on to someone who views you more as a choice he can’t make rather than someone he can’t imagine not being with.

You deserve someone who chooses you, and continues to choose you.

Someone who understands that you add value to their life, and not simply another commitment to juggle. Someone who understands that time is important—and it’s also short, so he makes the most of it by taking the chance with you right now. Someone who knows that you both may have things to work through, but they want to do that with you—not pushing you away until they feel 100% ready—because truthfully, none of us are truly ready.

Sometimes, people do need to be alone to deal with things. We don’t always get a say in the cards life tends to deal us, and maybe that means that the person you want is someone who just isn’t available to you now. It’s okay if you want to wait, but you should also know that you shouldn’t be expected to wait forever while someone reels you in and pushes you away in the name of self-preservation. Maybe, as much as it might pain you to admit it, the person just isn’t meant for you. Maybe, instead of holding onto what you hope might be, you let go and allow someone who is willing to choose you to take that shot instead. Let someone else step up and do exactly what you’ve been hoping for—that someone would choose you, right now.

Someone who knows after spending time with you and getting to know you, is ready to take your hand and start something new—something you didn’t expect, but is wonderful nonetheless.

So maybe, just maybe, it’s time to give the one you’ve been waiting for the time he’s been asking for all along. Maybe, you should choose the person who has been saying they have all the time in the world for you.

You never know what might happen. TC mark

Lacey Ramburger

I am low key obsessed with Myers-Briggs more than is probably healthy

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