1. Everyone thinks you’re DTF. Well, maybe not DTF, but they definitely think you’re flirting with them. You’re not! You just really like smiling!
2. But the people you’re actually flirting with are confused and don’t know if you’re flirting with them because they see you smiling at everyone! So, in your head, you’re basically trying to channel your smile to convey the message hi I think you are so cute, please like me. But they don’t hear you.
3. If people don’t think you’re flirting with them, they’re like, “Why are you smiling?” “Why are you so happy?” Hey, asshole, I don’t need to explain myself to you. Can’t a girl just smile? Sheesh!
3. People want to talk to you. Like, a lot.
4. They ask you for directions.
5. They ask you for the time.
6. They say things like, “lemme tell you about this one time…”
7. They tell you about the weather, their health problems, their sister-in-law who’s coming into town they CAN’T STAND.
8. Everyone wants to tell you their life story.
9. Meanwhile you’re just sitting on your laptop at a cafe trying to work like, can I live?
10. And if you’re a person who hates people but happens to have a really happy/nice looking face it is hell on earth.
11. Sometimes you smile or laugh in moments when you REALLY should not be smiling or laughing, so everyone just looks at you like you’re a dick.
12. People never expect you to be opinionated about anything. They think you look so sweet, so nice, but really you’re about to make it rain with strongly worded thoughts. When you give a piece of your mind they’re like oh damn.
13. And if you have a naturally sarcastic personality and fucked up sense of humor it’s even more confusing to people.
14. Everyone thinks because you look happy you want to be touched or hugged all the time. *shudders*
15. You’re the one everyone comes to with their problems because you seem kinder and more empathetic.
16. People are surprised when you actually show an emotion other than happy. Happy is and always has been your default state of being, but that doesn’t mean you don’t experience other feelings.
17. People think it’s cute when you get mad, which only makes you even angrier. And the angrier you get, the harder they laugh. *sigh*